Is Your Love Strong Enough?
by Nykey77
Summary: Can it survive anything? Betrayal, mistrust, attempted murder?...Tara was done believing it could. Devon Winston was way ahead of her there. Would they be proven wrong? Season 4 AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:**** All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.**

**ie. Other than my OCs, don't own diddily-squat :)**

**Hey there! Welcome to my SoA story. Its a Jax/Tara and Opie/OC AU fic. It takes place primarily in Season 4, but there are references to different takes on prior SoA events.**

**I hope you all enjoy. Feedback is more than welcomed. I'd love to know what you think and answer any questions you might have.**

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><p>Standing under the awning of the clubhouse, with Thomas dozing on her chest and Abel nearby coloring, Tara had never been so nervous.<p>

It had been a long fourteen months – working full time while raising two little boys by herself and traveling every weekend to Stockton to visit Jax. She wouldn't dream of keeping the boys away from their father, but that didn't change the fact that it had taken a toll on her. Truth of the matter was, the past three years had taken a toll on Tara and Jax imprisonment had only ignited what had been building inside of her for some time now.

It started when she found out she was pregnant. She was going to be a mother, but she quickly realized, as she watched Abel sleep that night, she already was. Since the moment she held his tiny heart in her hands and put it back together, he had captured hers. For those weeks he was in the NICU, it was so hard for her to keep a professional distance while growing more and more attached to the little boy.

When she and Jax finally figured out what they were doing with their relationship, Abel wasn't his extra baggage, but a bonus. He became a treasured priority in her life so quickly, caring for him was second nature.

It wasn't until later that she understood the magnitude of what she felt for Abel and it came to her in the worse way possible – when he was kidnapped.

She had never felt so helpless in those moments knowing if she tried to fight Cameron, she'd be dead, her unborn child would be dead and he still would've taken Abel. Those weeks after were even worse; trying to be there for Jax who was clearly pushing her away while trying to keep herself from falling apart. She felt completely alone in her grief especially when everyone around her seemed to have dismissed the fact that she thought of Abel as her own and treated her as if she was to blame. Feeling lost and alone, she jumped at any chance to help find him and try to fit in with the only family she ever had. In the end all she got was more blood on her hands, a broken heart and center in a hostage crisis.

In the hospital after being saved from Salazar and finding out that both Abel and the baby were okay, Tara had a revelation. She couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't be like Jax or Gemma and sacrifice her life and sanity for the club. She had two children that she needed to live for. She refused to put them second to anything, especially not to prove her loyalty or deal with any more heartache from Jax.

She had enough and started making plans in preparation for this day. And if necessary, she was more than ready to fight.

"You okay?" A brunette woman asked as she walked up next to Tara, breaking her out of her musing.

"Are _you_ okay? We're kind of in the same boat."

"True, but my husband is not my reason for being here. Just like I told his little porn star fiancée over there." She said nodding towards Lyla who was standing with some of the other wannabes. "I'm here for my father. I figure it's the least I could do."

"You sound so enthused."

She shrugged. "It takes a lot to love or even like Alexander Trager."

Devon Winston, nee Trager, was Tig's only child and Opie's estranged wife. Today was her first day back in Charming, California since she left two years ago. Her departure was sudden and without any goodbyes, but considering what caused her to flee, she hardly felt guilty about leaving. She doubted the club felt the same, abandoning your family was not cool. She wasn't very hopeful for a warm reception.

"He's going to be happy to see you. Everyone is." Tara assured her, giving her a quick squeeze around her shoulders.

"Piney didn't roar at me too loudly." She reminded herself. After lecturing her and getting an apology, Piney opened his arms to her. He gave her one of his big bear hugs, saying "I missed you little girl". It was reassuring to know that her father-in-law, who she had always been close to, didn't hate her. "And Gemma actually gave me a hug, that's a good sign."

"Yeah, but I think Gemma's too suspicious of me to worry about anyone else." Tara said, eying the biker queen on the other side of the lot.

"She would have said something by now if she knew."

Tara nodded. Thankfully Gemma was clueless to what was really going on with her and her son, but the woman had the senses of a bloodhound. She could tell that something was off.

"Maybe things will go better than you think."

Tara shrugged, though she knew today wouldn't end with happily ever after.

Suddenly they could hear the roar of motorcycles approaching.

"Here we go." Devon said, watching the bikes pull into the lot.

Everyone was cheering and clapping, and as the guys came to a stop, the crowd moved forward to welcome them home.

When Jax pulled up, he stopped right in front of Tara. He had a big smile on his face as he took off his helmet and sunglasses, and dismount from his bike. Tara was smiling just as brightly and so caught up in the moment, seeing him free again, she relished in the deep kiss he enveloped her in.

"Hey." He said once their lips separated.

"Welcome home."

"I missed you."

"You've been missed by us all." She looked down pointedly at their sleeping son and he gently cupped Thomas' head, kissing his temple. Tara turned slightly in search of their oldest. "Abel." She saw him popped up from the other side of the picnic table where he'd been coloring with some sidewalk chalk. "Daddy's home. Come say hi."

With a big grin on his face, Abel raced over to his parents and finally releasing Tara, Jax scooped him up.

"Hey buddy." He exclaimed and hugged his son close.

The four of them moved to sit at the picnic table to continue their reunion. After greeting her husband, Gemma joined them to welcome her son home.

Meanwhile, Devon had slipped away from Tara to greet her own family among the fleet of bikes. She strolled over to her father who already had a set of women throwing themselves at him.

"Excuse me? How about you two go prostitute yourselves to one of the other members, okay?"

Tig and the two girls looked over to see Devon standing there with a condescending smile. Fortunately for the girls, they knew who she was and quickly made an exit.

"Thanks." Devon said and now that her path was clear, she walked right into her father's open arms.

"Hey baby." Tig hugged her tight, picking her up off the ground. Too happy to see her to care about the interference with the welcoming home pussy.

"Hi Daddy."

"Man I missed you." He gave her one more squeeze before setting her down. "I'm glad you're here."

"Well I had to come and make sure you didn't get shanked or anything." She grinned as he laughed.

"Holy shit Devon." Someone called out from behind her.

She turned to see Kozik walking up to them. "What the hell are you doing here?" Looking at him, she took notice of the patches on his kutte. "You left Tacoma and patched in here?" She glanced at her father then back to Kozik, and laughed out loud. "Priceless!" She reached out to hug him, followed by Bobby, Chibs and Juice who had notice her presence as well.

Nearby, Opie stood with Lyla and some of the other members watching them all welcome his estranged wife. He almost gave himself whiplash when he heard Kozik shout her name. He couldn't believe his eyes, watching her standing there with his brothers.

Lyla noticed his reaction and filled him in on her tense introduction to Devon. He assured her that there was nothing to worry about. Her arrival was actually perfect timing so he could get the divorce proceedings started.

"Church." Clay called.

"You gonna stick around?" Jax asked Tara, even though he already knew the answer.

"No. I need to put the boys down for a nap so I'm going to head back to the house. I'll meet you there later?"

"Of course. I'll be home after we catch up on some business."

"Good because we need to talk now that you're home." She stated bluntly, wanting no misconception about what was happening between them.

It was time for them to have the conversation that had been put off for the last fourteen months; no one was getting out of it now.

Staring at her knowingly, he replied. "Alright." Tara nodded and moved to pack the boys up without another word.

Jax scrubbed his face, dread filling his gut, telling him that it wasn't going to end well. Until then, he had business to take care of and shook it off, heading into the clubhouse.

"Run along. Your king is calling his loyal servants." Devon mocked, standing next to her father's bike where he had parked it along the side of the lot.

"Stop." He warned. She was finally back home, now was not the time for her attitude. "You gonna hang here?"

"No, but I'm going to be in town for a little bit." She revealed, having decided to bite her tongue on a retort to his order. "I have some running around so I'll see you later."

"Cool." He kissed her cheek before walking away.

As the guys headed into the clubhouse, Devon rejoined Tara who was at her SUV, fastening the boys into their car seats.

"So was that the calm before the storm?" She asked in regards to her smooth reunion with Jax.

"Pretty much." Trepidation was written all over her face. "I got get the boys home. Hopefully they'll be asleep when the shit hits the fan."

"Call me if you need anything."

"I will."

They kissed each other on the cheek and Devon headed off to her car as Tara climbed into her SUV. Both drove away feeling a sense of foreboding to come for the next few days.

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><p><strong>So there it is. Did you like?<strong>

**The title of my story is inspired by the song _Is Your Love Strong Enough -_The Trent Reznor & How to Destroy Angels version. Each chapter will actually have a song dedication sort of speak. I'm a big music fan and a lot of the songs I picked remind me of the things that will be happening in my story.**

**If you want to know what Devon looks like, I put a link to a picture of who I envision as the character in my profile.**

**Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer – SoA is not mine in any way, shape or form. It all belongs to KS.**

**Thank you so much for all the reviews, favs/follows and views. I'm so happy you guys are liking my story :)**

**This next chapter is all about Devon's background – her childhood, her relationship with Opie and why she left him and Charming. Someone asked about the Winston kids – they don't exist in my story. Opie and Devon do not have children.**

**WARNING – there is use of a derogatory term in this chapter. I personally do not condone the use of any derogatory term at all. The Sons do unfortunately and I wanted to stay true to the twistedness that is Tig. I mean no offense at all…And Tig will pay for the words that come out of his mouth…**

**The musical inspiration for this chapter is _Goodbye My Lover_ – James Blunt**

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><p>Devon had just arrived in Charming that afternoon so she didn't have time before heading to the clubhouse to drop off her bags at her childhood home. Headed there now, she was driving down Main Street and spotting one of the local salons, she decided to stop in for a moment.<p>

Of the two salons in town, Dizzy Izzy's was the "hip" salon that catered to the younger women of Charming while Martha's down the street was preferred by all the old bitties. Most of their clientele was made up of the club's Old Ladies - including Gemma, croweaters and sweet butts. The club always supported their own and Dizzy Izzy's was owned by two of SAMCRO's Old Ladies – Devon and her mother, Isabel.

"Devon!" Maritza, the salon manager, exclaimed when she walked in and gave her a big hug. "It's so good to see you honey. Is your mother with you?"

"No, it's just me. I'm here visiting my father so of course I had to stop in and see how you're doing."

"Well I'm glad you did. How long are you in town?"

"Not very long."

"Aw that's too bad. We sure do miss you around here. I know your booth misses you too." She pointed to the station that still held all her tools and even the pictures that framed the mirror.

"Oh wow." Devon awed, touched that they had kept everything the way she left it.

She walked over to get a closer look and was overwhelmed by all the memories. This booth had been a part of her life since she was baby. It was originally her mother, Isabel's, going back to the day she first opened Dizzy Izzy's when she was twenty-five.

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Isabel had left her home in Los Angeles to start anew in Northern California. She wasn't sure where she was going, but after a rest stop for the day in Charming; both a storefront for sale and a house for rent made her a permanent resident. That was solidified even further when the occasional hook up with one of the local bikers produced a baby girl…Devon.

Tig was less than enthused about fatherhood and quickly when MIA. Isabel was prepared to be a single mother, but to her surprise, after their daughter was born, Tig started showing up randomly just to "check up on things". Those checkups became more frequent and it wasn't long before Tig was firmly wrapped around little Devon's finger. Things progressed into a full blown relationship between Tig and Isabel as well. He moved into the house she rented which they eventually brought together, and Isabel and Devon were formally introduced to his SAMCRO family. Isabel kept her association with the club to a minimum; having her own life and responsibilities to focus on. On the other hand, Devon grew up surrounded by the Sons of Anarchy.

The clubhouse was a second home to her, her father's brothers became her uncles, Gemma was like a second mother, and Jax and Opie were her running buddies. The three of them used to cause all kinds of trouble together all over town.

It wasn't always the perfect life, but it was the only life Devon knew.

Her parents had a volatile relationship and they broke up and got back together all the time. Even Devon and her father's relationship had its ups and downs. Tig was the first person she ever punched at the tender age of seven.

Devon was in the office at TM doing her homework while she waited for her mother to pick her up. She could hear her father talking to his brothers in the garage and she heard him calling somebody a "wetback". She froze, knowing that word. She had heard some mean guys with bald heads call her mommy that in the grocery store one day. Her mommy told them off, reminding them who her daddy was and the bad guys left the store. In the car, on the way home, her mommy explained to her what happened and what that word meant when she asked. It was not a nice word and people should not say it. Especially not her Daddy.

Jumping out of the chair, she marched into the garage. He father was sitting on a trolley with his back to her so he didn't know she was there until she tapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey baby girl." He said once he turned towards her.

Before he knew it, she had cocked back her little arm and punched him right in the jaw. It caught him off guard and there was some force behind it enough for him to slump over.

"Don't you say that word! It's a bad word!" She yelled with one hand on her hip and the other shaking a finger in his face.

"Alright kid. Geez." He said, rubbing at his jaw that would sport a small bruise later that day.

"Hmm." Devon snorted at him dismissively and marched away haughtily, leaving her father and his laughing brothers behind.

The club would never be mistaken for being politically correct, but they made sure to watch what they said around Devon from that day forward.

That moment was firmly etched into SAMCRO history and set the definition for Devon that she would live up to for the rest of her life. She was the club princess, a total sweetheart, unless you crossed her. Then she'd make you pay no matter who you were. It endeared her to them all even more.

A few years passed and unfortunately Tig and Isabel were fighting more than making up. Isabel was fed up with Tig's shit so one day she packed up herself and Devon, left the staff in charge of the shop and left Charming for Mesa, Arizona. Devon spent her formative years bouncing between parents – Mesa during the school year and Charming during summer break.

By the time she turned thirteen, her place within the club started changing. She, Opie and Jax had gone through puberty, and Devon and Opie started looking at each other differently. Instead of running off with Jax to play or cause mischief, they were ditching Jax to run off and make out. It became a well-known fact that Devon was Opie's and Opie was Devon's. It stayed that way all throughout high school even when Devon was in Mesa. Opie was too in love with her to cheat and the croweaters and sweet butts were too afraid of Devon to make a move on him. She had already taken a couple of them down just for looking at him the wrong way.

To be so young, their relationship was one of the strongest. There was no question that one day they would be married. However, they did hit a bump in the road when Devon graduated from high school.

She had every intention of returning to Charming to be with Opie, but she had goals to accomplish before she made the move. She wanted to get her cosmetology license and then an Associate's degree in business management so when she did move back, she could take over as part owner of the salon. Opie was not happy with her plan to put off their reunion, but Devon would not be deterred. She wanted more out of her life than just being his Old Lady. Opie knew he couldn't win and he loved her too much to stop her from being happy.

For four years, they continued on as they had been – Devon spending the majority of her summer with Opie in Charming. When she finished school, she tearfully left her mother, who gave her blessing despite her own history with her father, and moved to Charming permanently. She settled into the house Opie brought for them, established herself as co-owner of Izzy's and built her own clientele. Before anyone knew, she was walking down the aisle to become Mrs. Harry "Opie" Winston.

The first years of marriage were pure bliss for Devon and Opie. They were like any other young couple spending all their free time together; vegging out in front of the TV, playing video games, going on bike rides out of town and making love whenever and wherever they wanted.

Married life hadn't changed who either of them were, even in regards to the club.

Opie had been patched in along with Jax four years ago and he had made a name for himself, solidifying his position as the future VP. Being a product of SAMCRO, Devon was never the typical Old Lady. She attended family dinners and helped out at SAMCRO charity functions, but she also made appearances at club parties. Nothing happened there that she hadn't witnessed before and Opie would never cheat so it wasn't like there was anything to hide from her. Besides Devon was stubborn and they had stopped trying to kick her out long ago.

When it came to club business, Devon was still privy to the same information, but she continued to stay out of it. When she was a teenager, she found out about the club's illegal activities and she wasn't proud of what they did, but it was out of her control to stop it. Despite it all, she loved Opie and she understood that this was the only life he knew. She couldn't condemn him for that. She would always be there to support him and be a source of peace in the middle of all the club's chaos. And that was as far as her involvement went. Devon was clear from day one that she was _Opie's_ Old Lady. She pledged allegiance to him, not the club. If she did something for SAMCRO, it was only for Opie's benefit. If it didn't help him and she felt it was too risky, she refused to lift a finger.

She argued with Gemma once about her role. It was a short argument ending with Gemma conceding to Devon who would not be swayed or bullied. Devon marched to the beat of her own drum since she was young and that wasn't going to change now that she was married. Fortunately, everyone still loved and accepted her the same and vice versus.

The only thing that mattered to Devon was having a happy life with Opie. And they were so in love nothing could touch them or bring them down…Until something did.

Opie was arrested for arson. He was found guilty and sentenced to five years in prison.

Devon wasn't sad, she was livid. She knew all the details of the botched explosion, in particular how Kyle Hobart bailed on Opie. It pissed her off that he was just being let off the hook. Bobby tried to make her understand that being excommunicated from the club was the worst thing that could happen to a Son, but it wasn't enough for Devon. She wanted Kyle in jail, not her husband. Angry at the club for getting caught up in this shit in the first place, she took off back to Mesa for awhile. Visiting Opie at Chino was as far into California as she went for a year. Opie worried about her safety away from the club, so to keep him sane while he was inside, Devon returned to Charming. But things had changed between her and SAMCRO, everyone felt it. She wasn't so blasé anymore about their dealings and how it blew back on the family when things went sideways. Opie's imprisonment was the start of Devon's disillusion with the club.

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Five years seemed like forever, and when Opie was released, Devon refused to stay behind in Charming. She was right there with the guys in front of Chino, waiting for his release. The minute those prison gates open with Opie on the other side, she ran to him full force. When he saw her racing towards him, he felt a peace come over him that had been missing for five years. He dropped the bag of his belongings and opened his arms to her. Devon jumped and wrapped her body around her husband.

"Finally." She sighed happily into the side of his neck. She clutched the sides of his face and laid big lush kiss on his lips. Opie buried his hand into her hair, tilting her head to delve deeper.

They both were so wrapped up in each other that they were oblivious to his brothers whistling and catcalling. When they separated, Devon slid down and let his brothers welcome him, but she stayed as close to him as possible.

After receiving hugs from them all and getting his kutte back from Jax, Opie got on his sorely missed bike. He only needed one more thing before he was ready to go home and with a grin, he reached out to Devon. With a beaming smile, she climbed on behind him, holding on to him tight. As the caravan of bikes rode away from Chino, each Son flipping the prison off, Devon rested her head on to her husband's back hoping to never see that place or any other like it again.

They returned to Charming, going straight to Teller-Morrow where a party was raring to celebrate Opie's release. However, Devon had different plans.

When the guys tried to pull Opie along with the crowd into the clubhouse, she interceded them, stepping right in her husband's path.

"Oh no. You don't need to go in there." She put her hands on the middle of his chest and pushed him back. "Because what you need is not in there." She twisted his t-shirt in her grip and pulled him around as she walk back towards his bike.

"It's not?" He chuckled at the cute, mischievous grin on her face.

"No. What you need is right here." She pointed to herself. "And its going home, to get naked, and get into our bed…Or on the couch, or the kitchen table or anywhere you want me."

She had let go of his shirt and with each statement, she took a step back. He followed until he was separated from the crowd. She turned away from him and continued on to his bike, her steps fluid and seductive. Opie was hopeless not to follow.

"Hey Op! Where you going?" Jax yelled when he realized his best friend was not a part of his own party.

He tore his eyes off his wife and turned back to face him. "Uh…I gotta go home brother." He stuttered with a dopey grin on his face. He looked back to see Devon straddling his bike. Turning to Jax, he lied. "Sorry."

Jax laughed and waved him off. "Have fun bro! I'll see you later."

On the way to their house, Devon couldn't keep her hands still. She had snaked them under his shirt, teasingly stroking up and down his bare chest. Opie was having a hard time focusing on the ride especially as she started nibbling on his earlobe. When they finally made it home, he haphazardly parked in the driveway. Climbing off, he startled her as he yanked her up from the back seat. Grinning and giggling madly with anticipation, she wrapped her legs and arms around him, holding on for an even better ride inside.

For the rest of the afternoon and into the night, Devon and Opie made love, reconnecting in every way possible.

Past nightfall, Devon was woken up by a motorcycle engine starting and found herself in bed alone. Listening to his bike drive away, she reached out to touch his empty side of the bed, feeling a piece of paper.

_Went back to the club._

_Love O_

As she laid back, staring at the dark ceiling, a wave of dread came over her. This wasn't going to stop. They had already lost five years of their life together and they were only going to lose more. The club was changing, it was like they were on some sort of power trip and getting deeper into arms dealing, making more enemies. Opie was going to get pulled in deeper and eventually she would lose him to the chaos. She had to do something to stop it.

When he came home later the next day, she was in the kitchen, washing out the highlights she'd just put in her hair.

"Hey."

"Hi." She said from underneath the towel she was drying her hair with. "Have fun?"

"Yeah I did." He approached her, pulling the towel out of her hands and placing a kiss on her lips. "It's good to be home."

"It's good to have you home." She said and threw her damp hair up into a sloppy bun. "I'm just worried it's not going to last."

"What are you talking about?"

She sighed. "Look, I don't want to have some big argument. I'm not going to stress over this or nag you about it, but I have to say this at least once." Peering up at him soberly, she continued. "I am not Luann. I won't waste any more years of my life waiting for you if you go back to prison." Opie exhaled deeply, his head tilting back in frustration. Devon grabbed his face, forcing him to look back at her as she changed the subject. "Now I'm hungry. How about you take me for a ride and we go get something to eat?" She was smiling brightly as if nothing was wrong. She said her piece so she was putting it all in the past to concentrate on the future, hopefully a happy one.

With her words rattling in his head, Opie hesitated before he replied. "Sure." He pushed a smile out and Devon wrapped her arms around his waist.

"I love you Opie."

"I love you too." He held her close, needing to feel her as close to him as possible right now.

He wasn't going to fight with her over this because he knew she was completely serious. He knew her opinion of the club. The only reason she put up with it was because she loved him. Now that he'd done time in prison, she cared even less for SAMCRO. She stood by him through those five years, but each time she visited him, he could see it was wearing her down. It wasn't a surprise to him that she wouldn't go through it again, not if he was actively putting himself at risk for another stint in prison.

So for a time, Opie tried to play it straight for her. He got a full time job at the saw mill and only dealt with the club socially. But the club was in his blood, he couldn't be half in and half out forever.

Devon said nothing when she found him in the garage one day preparing to head out on a club job. She simply helping him put his kutte on, kissed him and told him that she loved him. He knew where she stood and he had obviously made a choice. If things went wrong, their marriage would suffer and he'd have no one to blame but himself.

For a few months, luck was on Opie's side and he stayed clear of the law while he reestablished himself in the club. Of course that luck ran out and Devon found herself opening her door to an AFI agent knocking. She said nothing, let the bitch say what she had to say and then kicked her out. But when Opie came home, she had plenty to say to him.

"I had a visitor today Op." She flicked the agent's business card at his chest. "From the ATF. Threatened the take the house, the shop and put both of us in jail if I didn't tell her what I knew about SAMCRO." Of course she would never say anything and there wasn't anything they could use against her personally. They could make her life difficult during the span of their investigation and that was enough to piss Devon off. "I swear to God if I end up in cuffs because of some shit that you and the guys pulled, I'll be back in Arizona so fast your head will spin."

"Devon." He said, trying to calm her down.

"Don't talk because there is nothing you can say." She fumed and turned away from him, walking out of the room.

Things only went downhill from there and the ATF made good on their threats. They closed down Dizzy for a money laundering investigation and dragged both Opie and Devon into the Department of Justice in Stockton. Stahl put the pressure on them to rat to save themselves, but she was unsuccessful and lucky she had nothing solid to hold them. Unfortunately, the damage was already done. She had made it look like Opie and Devon had turned on SAMCRO. Opie had to convince the club that they hadn't and thankfully, it worked…Or so they thought.

The night of Abel's welcome home party, Opie had offered to make a beer run for Gemma. As he was just about to climb into Devon's car, she ran outside to stop him.

"Baby, let me go instead. I want to stop by and check on Tara anyway." She had seen her storm out with Jax chasing behind her. He had no doubt done something to piss her off and at the time, Devon knew she needed to be left alone. But Tara was her best friend, she had to make sure she was okay.

"Alright." Opie said, trading places with her. "I'll let Jax know he's dead when you get back." He quipped.

"Ha, ha. No need. I saw his face. Looks like Tara got one in good." She grinned and as she lift up on her tip toes, he bent over the open door to kiss her. "Love you."

"I love you too."

Pulling away from Jax's, Devon headed towards town center, singing along to the radio. She came up on a yellow light and tried to blow through it, but it changed too quickly and she had to slam on her brakes. Her cell was sitting in the passenger seat and went flying into the foot well. She was reached down to retrieve it when all of a sudden, she heard gun fire and the back window shattered. Screaming, she went into survival mode and slammed on the gas. Her head stayed down the entire time so she didn't see the car coming through the intersection and it t-boned her driver side. Her car went careening across the road, over the curb and into a tree. Thankfully, she had her seatbelt on, but it didn't stop her from being jerked around violently or her head from banging into the side of the steering wheel.

Groaning in pain and disorientated, she grabbed her head, feeling the blood seeping from a gash at her hairline.

"Oh God. Devon." Someone said and her door was opened.

Recognizing the voice, she looked up at the masked man standing next to her. "Dad?" She hissed, feeling a new pain at her side from hitting the console. She was so out of it, she could barely put two and two together. "What are you-What?" She took a good look at him; what he was wearing, the unknown SUV stopped nearby and it all clicked into place. "Oh my God. What did you do?"

"Baby…."

"What did you do?!" She cried. She could hear sirens coming from a far and she didn't want the police involved in this. They couldn't fix this, nothing could fix this. "Get out of here."

"Devon-"

"If they see you here, I will not cover for you." She seethed, fury and tears in her eyes.

Tig hesitated, not waiting to leave her, but the cops were getting closer. Looking at his daughter one last time, he jumped into the SUV and took off.

The police and ambulance arrived and Devon was taken to the hospital for examination. Unser had arrived at the scene and after being briefed on the situation, he placed a call to Jax, looking for Opie. He was still with him at his place and when the news came through, the house quickly cleared out, all of his brothers following Opie to the hospital.

Thundering into St. Thomas, Opie growled at the front desk attendant, scaring the crap out of the woman as he demanded to know where his wife was. Getting the information and find the triage room, he barraged in while the doctor was giving Devon her exam.

"Opie." She sighed in relief and he rushed to her side, ignoring the doctor's protest. He sat on the edge of the bed and Devon threw her arms around him. Burying her face in his shoulder, she finally let the tears flow.

The doctor excused himself, knowing his warning went on deaf ears and decided to come back later.

Jax and Clay had joined Opie while the others stayed in the lobby. Hearing Devon crying, Jax knew it was best to give them time alone. He grabbed a reluctant Clay and back tracked out of the room. They could get the details on what happened later.

"Oh God Op I was so scared."

"Baby what happened?"

"I don't know. I was at a stop light and all of a sudden someone started shooting." She kept her explanation vague, feigning confusion around the specifics. "I didn't see who was shooting. I don't know why anyone would come after me."

Opie pulled her back into his arms and murmured. "It's okay baby. I'll find who did this and I'll make them pay." He promised and kissed her forehead. "I'm so sorry baby."

They held each other for a while until the doctor returned to finish his examination. Devon was diagnosis with bruised ribs and a concussion so they were admitting her overnight for observation. While she was being transferred to another room, Opie went to fill the guys in.

Devon wasn't in the mood for any visitors so he sent her love and gratitude for them all being there. They left the hospital with pledges to their brother to find out who did this to his wife.

Opie returned to Devon's side in her hospital room and they spent the night, not saying much or even paying attention to the TV playing uselessly. Opie had gotten into the bed with her and she laid on his chest, holding him close. They were both content to just be together after everything that had happened tonight.

Devon more than Opie because she knew this would be for the last time. This was the final straw in her fight against the club for Opie. And she had lost.

If Opie ever found out what happened, sure he'd be furious at first, mabye beat up her father or even Clay. But overtime he'd grow to "understand" why they did what they did, to protect the club. He'd give them both a pass and continue to walk side by side with his brothers.

She couldn't do that. She couldn't forget or forgive this and she damn sure couldn't sit back and watch her husband, the love of her life, defend both of their would-be killers. She couldn't stand to see him choose the club over her.

She had loved Opie with all her heart for her entire life, but was her love strong enough to compete with his love for the club? She didn't know anymore and it was breaking her heart. It was bad enough worrying that he would go back to prison, now this. She couldn't take it anymore. She had to get away – from Charming, SAMCRO – and that included Opie because he would never leave. Not even for her. If she stayed she'd only end up hating him and that would destroy her. She had to rip her own heart out and walk away now.

The next morning, Devon was still awake thanks to the nurses who keep watch over her through the night. Opie had fallen asleep beside her, but he woke when the day nurse came into to introduce herself and let Devon know that the doctor would be by to examine her once he came on shift to see if she could be discharged.

As the nurse was leaving, Tara stopped in having just finished an early morning surgery. Opie excused himself and Devon filled her in on what happened, omitting Clay and Tig's involvement. Tara looked spooked enough, she didn't want to make it worse. That would happen all on its own anyway.

Tara was like her; she loved her man, not the club. Unfortunately Jax, like Opie, loved the club more than anything else and eventually that would complicate their relationship as well.

As much as Devon wanted to warn her friend to cut her losses now, it wasn't her place to do so. It would only be a matter of time before she was running away again too.

When Tara left to answer a page, Devon let her go and simply smiled when she said she'd check in on her later. Silently, she wished Tara luck and she said goodbye to her best friend.

Alone for the first time since she was admitting, Devon could no longer fight her physical and especially her emotional exhaustion, and she fell asleep. She had only been out for a short while when she woke to the sound of Opie and Jax talking.

"Hey baby." Opie said when he saw her stir. She pushed herself upright and grimaced from a sharp pain in her side. Alarmed, Opie quickly moved closer to her. "You okay?"

"I'm fine, just sore and hungry." She smiled reassuringly.

"I can have the nurse bring you something."

She scrunched up her face. "No, hospital food is gross. Can you go to the diner and pick me up some food?" Her voice was saccharine and her eyes were wide with false innocence, making him laugh. "Jax can keep me company. Won't you Jax?" She looked at him pointedly over Opie's shoulder as he turned to face his brother.

"Yeah I'll stay." Jax agreed, knowing why she really wanted Opie out of the room.

"Alright." He stood up to leave. "I'll get you some pancakes and sausage."

"Mm, yum." She grinned. "Hey, can you stop by the house and get me some clothes too?" He nodded and leaned down to kiss her. He patted Jax on the shoulder in passing and left.

The second the door shut, Jax started. "Dev." He was trying to hold off any hysterics, but she cut him off.

"I don't want you to say anything Jax. I want you to find my father and bring him to me right now."

"He's in the lobby, been there all night." He revealed. On his way into to see Opie this morning, the nurse at the front desk had pointed Tig out and asked that he let Devon know he had been sleeping there waiting to see her. It did nothing to move him and given the snort Devon let out, it did nothing for her either.

"To see if I would talk I'm sure." She spoke snidely.

Jax gave her a look that told that he was thinking along the same line. After his talk with Hale, he knew that Clay and Tig had done this trying to get to Opie. He wanted answers as well. "Hold tight." He walked out the room and a few moments later, he returned with a ragged looking Tig behind him.

When Devon saw her father, rage consumed her. The room was silent as she stared at him, trying to keep herself in check before she jumped out of the bed and killed him with her bare hands. Taking a deep breath, she finally spoke, getting straight to the point.

"Putting a hit on Opie wasn't a club decision was it Jax? You wouldn't have let that happen."

"You know I wouldn't have." Jax answered, glaring at Tig who stood just in front of him.

"I know. And I know my father won't piss or shit without Clay's say so, so I'm guessing they were in on it together." Devon continued to stare her father down, wanting him to feel the burning anger inside of her.

"That's my guess too."

"So what lie are you going to tell him, Dad, to cover up this shit that you and Clay did?"

"It was an accident."

"It was not an accident. Clay knew exactly what he was doing when he made the order and you knew exactly what you were doing when you pulled that trigger." She fumed, her deep hurt starting to mix with the anger coursing through her. "I wanna know why you tried to kill my husband."

"We thought Op ratted." He said as if it was a valid explanation.

"He told you he didn't!" She yelled. "He gave up his freedom for five years for the club. He'd do it again. He'd _die_ for the club and you thought he was a rat? That's your excuse?" She said incredulously. "God you are pathetic."

"We were protecting the club."

"Fuck the club!" She screamed. "What about me? Your daughter! Did you even think about me when you agreed to kill him?" If he was a real father just the thought of causing his child any kind of hurt would have been unimaginable. Did he care so little about her to do this? "What were you going to do when I got the call that he was dead? Were you going to hold me while my heart broke and I cried my eyes out? Sit by me and hold my hand as I watched them lower my husband's body into the ground?" She would have unknowingly sought comfort from her husband's murderer. Just thinking about it made her sick to her stomach, but then there was the other side of the coin. "What if I hadn't moved out the way when you started shooting?" Tears began to fill her eyes. "Would you be the one to call my mother and tell her that her child was dead? Hold her while she cried as they buried me instead?" Tig's face actually blanched at her words. "Huh? Tell me!"

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not." She quickly argued. "You're not sorry because you have no heart. You don't care about anything or anyone, including me. So guess what?" She sniffed and wiped her fallen tears on her cheek. "I don't give a fuck about you either. Not anymore." Her tears began to cloud her vision again as she looked at her father for the last time. "Get out and stay out. You are no longer my father and I want you out of my life forever."

"Devon." He reached out to her, trying in vain to hold on to the only flesh and blood he had in the world.

"Get out! Both of you get the hell away from me." She demanded.

Respecting her wishes, Jax grabbed Tig and pulled him from the room. It was his turn with the Sergeant at Arms now.

Once Devon heard their arguing voices drift away from her door, she finally burst into tears, audibly sobbing. She cried for all the pain from this betrayal and the loss of her father. He was far from perfect, but she had always thought that he at least loved her. Now she knew the truth and their relationship was ruined.

"Dev." Opie called out when he came back into her room and found her bed empty.

The bathroom door opened and she stepped out, now fresh faced after her crying jag.

"You got my goodies." She reached out to take one of the bags and he pulled it away from her, looking at her charmingly. He wasn't planning on letting her carry or do anything really, for quite a while.

Devon grinned at his chivalrous gesture and stretched up to give him a kiss. She moved gingerly back over to the bed and Opie followed close, hovering. What he really wanted to do was pick her up and carry her, but that would probably only make her pain worse.

She settled into her nest of blankets and pillows, and they tucked into their late breakfast. A nurse stopped in while they were eating to let Devon know that an emergency had come up and it would be a little while longer before the doctor could see her.

The new did not please Opie. Devon could see he was getting antsy so she suggested that he go for a ride or go home to get some rest until she called for him to pick her up. Opie reluctantly agreed, saying he'd go to the clubhouse and see if his brothers had found out anything about her attack.

"Okay." She replied, trying with everything in her not to scream out the truth to him. The truth would only prolong the inevitable.

"Call me when you get word from the doc."

She nodded and he left her with a kiss, which she held on to for just a bit longer, savoring the feel of his lips. "Opie." She stopped him just as he was opening the door. He turned to her and she stared, making sure to memorize every piece, every angle of his face. Her eyes began to water knowing this would probably be the last time she saw him. "I love you. I love you more than anything."

"I love you too baby." He chuckled. Being such a tough girl, she was so cute when she got all sentimental. "See you later."

The door closed behind him and sobbing quietly as possible, weak with heartache, Devon managed to climb out of bed and dress in the clothes he brought her. She got her clothes from last night and thankfully, she found her credit card and ID still in her back pocket. She called a cab company and ordered a fare to Stockton. It would be expensive, but she couldn't risk being seen at the Charming bus depot and word getting back to Opie.

Leaving everything else behind, she snuck out of the hospital room, pass the front desk that was gloriously empty and she exited St. Thomas to find her cab waiting. No one saw her leave and she stayed low in the back seat of the cab until they crossed the Charming town line.

Arriving at the bus station in Stockton, she brought a one-way ticket to Mesa. Not long before her bus was to depart, she made a phone call.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

After his heated talk with Clay, Jax was back at the clubhouse having received a call from Opie. He had asked him for a full table so they could discuss strategy for finding the people he tried to kill Devon. He had to figure out his own strategy to tell Opie the truth so he offered to head out and wrangle up the others, hoping to buy himself some time.

He was just about to start up his bike when his phone rang. "Yeah."

"I'm leaving Jax." She started right off. She couldn't afford to let him get a word in edgewise and convince her to stay. "Even if he never finds out, I can't pretend like it's okay. It's not okay." She choked out, her never-ending tears getting in the way. "So I have to go."

Realizing who he was talking to and what she was saying, Jax implored. "Dev, you can't do this to Op. It'll kill him."

"If I stay, it'll kill us both." Over time they would only grow to resent each other for not being able to give what the other needed and their relationship was fall apart anyway. "I need you to take care of him for me and don't let come after me." She begged. "Tell him I lied, I don't love him, not anymore. Not after this and I don't want to be with him. I don't even want to see him again." She cried, barely capable of voicing the blatant lie.

"No. Wait a minute."

"Goodbye Jax."

"Devon. Devon." He tried, but was only met with the sound of a dial tone. "Fuck."

Even if he tried to find her, there was no tell where she was. This couldn't be happening. Devon and Opie were each other's world for as long as he could remember. Devon leaving would crush Opie and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Dreadfully, Jax dismounted from his bike and walked back into the clubhouse. He pulled his best friend aside into the chapel.

He knew the truth wouldn't bring Devon back to Opie and loathed to admit it, Clay was right. If everyone found out what really happened to Devon, it would break SAMCRO. So Jax did what Devon told him and he watched his best friend, his brother, break down. He engulfed him in his arms, using all his strength to keep him standing. He had never seen Opie like this and that scared him. But Jax knew what he was feeling, felt it once before and he knew that Opie would survive it too.

He'd just have to wait for the pain to dull and eventually, he'd get used to the hole in his heart.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

That evening, Devon finally arrived in Mesa. She hailed another cab and was dropped off at her mother's salon, DI2.

"Welcome to DI – Oh Devon….Hi." The receptionist stumbled over her words as she took in the state of her boss's daughter. Her hair was in a sloppy bun, her face was blotchy and puffy, and her eyes were bright red. She had obviously been crying for a long time.

"Is my mother here?"

"Yeah. She's in back."

Devon walked through the entryway onto the salon floor and spotted her mother at her booth, dying a client's hair, talking about the latest gossip around town.

"Mommy." Her soft, sad voice ran out gaining her mother's attention.

Isabel looked up and immediately, she dropped what she was doing at the sight of her broken child. "Devon." She rushed over to her with her arms open and Devon collapsed into them, crying out in anguish.

"It's over. Me and Opie are over."

"Oh baby, what happened?"

"I,I." She couldn't speak, it hurt so much. "Oh God I feel like I'm dying."

Isabel moved them into her office in back and she held her daughter on the couch as she continued to fall apart.

Her mother stroked her back, cooed and murmured into her ear that everything would be okay. But it would never be okay again.

First of all, she had to carry this secret inside of her, she couldn't even vent to her mother because she would go back to Charming and kill every single member of SAMCRO. Worse yet, she would forever have a broken heart.

Opie was the love of her life. She would never love anyone else, she didn't want to. Regrettably, they were now doomed to always have this wedge between them; one made of lies, secrets, misplaced loyalty, and a need for revenge that would never be fulfilled.

Those were odds neither would be able to get over so maybe in the end, she and Opie were better off apart. And maybe one day, Devon would be able to breathe without the other half of herself.

* * *

><p><strong>Now I know some people might be frustrated with Devon and how she just left Opie without giving him a chance. The reason for that is Opie's reaction when he found out the truth. It's the same as it was in cannon. Devon can see that writing on the wall and it's unacceptable for her. Devon is a product of the club (a product of Tig, meaning she's a little nutty LoL), she doesn't take betrayal lightly and she wants the kind of revenge that the club doles out – she wants Clay and her father dead. (Obviously those feelings towards her father changed, that will be addressed later; her feelings towards Clay are still very much lethal)<strong>

**Why didn't Opie go after Devon once he found out the truth? Well she left him without giving him a chance, she must not have loved him or wanted him as much as he believed.**

**For anyone who would like to see the face I envision as Isabel, there is a link in my profile.**

**Let me know what you think! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: SoA is not mine in any way, shape or form. It all belongs to KS.**

**As always, thank you to the _max_ for the reviews, fav/follows and views!**

**To answer a question about why Devon came back to Charming now...Well, to see her father in part, but she has another reason that I'll be revealing later. And as for more Tara and Devon interactions...There aren't any in this chapter, but there are definitely more to come. Where Jax and Opie have their bro-mance, Tara and Devon have their...opposite of bro-mance? Sis-mance? LoL**

**Flashbacks are in italics**

**Chapter Soundtrack: _Hanging On_: Ellie Goulding**

* * *

><p>"Everything okay?" Gemma asked when the guys strolled into the clubhouse.<p>

"Yeah they made it to Putlova's without a tail." Tig answered taking a seat with Bobby at the bar and signaling for a beer from Rat.

"Well there's food in the kitchen if you're hungry."

"Thanks Gemma." Juice said along with the others as they made a break for the kitchen.

"You are a disgusting pig!" Devon screeched, walking into the clubhouse. She slapped the back of her father's head as she circled to face him. "The house is a complete mess."

"Your room's clean."

"It's the _only_ room that's clean." She pointed out and with smirk, she added. "Still afraid to go in there I see."

Growing up she never had to worry about her father coming into her room and snooping through her things because of her dolls scattered around. Whenever she played with them, she had to stay in her room with the door shut. It never bothered her, it actually came in handy when she was older. She could do whatever she wanted in there without interruption; like smoking pot, drink and sneak Opie in at night.

Tig growled at her taunt. "Fine. I'll send the prospects over to clean it."

"No you won't." She dropped her bag on the top of the bar and went around the back to where the phone sat. She found a phone book there as well and pulled it out. "I'm calling a maid service and you're paying for it. It'll serve you right trashing the house like that." She sassed, flipping through the pages. "And I'm so telling Mom."

"Fuckin' snitch."

She stuck her tongue out at him.

"How is your mother doing darling?" Piney asked, ambling over to join them around the bar.

"Ask Dad. They've been swappin' letters since he went in." She spilled, the phone now tucked between her ear and her shoulder as she dialed.

"I thought she was too crazy for you Tiggy?" Bobby asked, even though he knew there was no such thing. "Unless she's changed." He looked to Devon who was shaking her head adamantly.

"Oh no. Izzy's still bat shit and I love it." Tig said gleefully.

Finishing the call, Devon filled her father in. "Ok, they're sending someone over there today. It'll probably take them like two days so you can sleep in that pig pen if you want to, but I need somewhere to stay."

"You can stay with us baby." Gemma offered.

"Um…I don't think that's a good idea Gemma." Devon said hesitantly, not wanting to offend her, but not wanting her to get the wrong impression. Her return did not change how she felt about the club and it especially didn't change her contempt for Clay. The last place she wanted to be is in that man's house.

Gemma could see what she was thinking as clear as day in her eyes and an edgy silence settled between the two women. They stared at each other; Devon refusing to pretend and Gemma fighting to save face and keep the guilt at bay.

"You can stay at my house." Piney spoke up, cutting through the tension.

"Thanks Piney." Gemma and Devon looked away from each other at the same time, and Devon changed the subject. "Ooh food." She exclaimed when she saw one of the old ladies come out of the kitchen with a plate.

Everyone laughed at her enthusiasm and it was like nothing had happened. It was easier than hashing out the big black cloud from that past that still lingered over them all. Easier to focus on a beloved family member's return.

Gemma smiled when she caught Tig grinning as he watched his daughter walk off. "Look at you."

"What? I'm glad she's back and she's actually happy to see me."

"I know you are baby." She put a comforting arm over his shoulders.

It had taken a long time, the entire duration of his time served to get his daughter back in his life. At first when he would call her, she never accepted his calls. It crushed him every time, but he kept trying and started sending letters. In them he confessed his sins and begged her forgiveness, telling her how much he loved her. He told her how almost killing her had changed him and how he wasn't even sure who he was anymore to have risked causing her pain. She was the only good thing in his life.

He had sent four letters of this with no response. He was running out of any hope that he could get her back when she finally answered him. Her letter was filled with a lot of scream-y, angry writing – all caps and exclamation points. Despite his fear of anymore hurtful words she might spew, he responded, knowing he deserved whatever she wanted to throw at him. She wrote him back again and it was the start of a steady stream of communication between them. They managed to rebuild their relationship and he eventually gained her forgiveness…..But not without a warning.

_I forgive you Dad, but I will never forget what you did. If you ever try to hurt someone I love or turn your gun on me again, whether it be intentional or by accident – I will kill you._

She meant what she said and he was okay with that. He deserved nothing less. And even though he was never one for promises, he promised Devon that he wouldn't do anything like that again. He swore to himself that he would keep that promise. Losing her made him realize how important she was to him and he didn't want to risk losing her again.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

While Clay headed back to the clubhouse to deliver the news from the meeting, Jax went him to face whatever was in store for him and Tara.

He walked into the house feeling a sense of déjà vu when he saw her sitting at the kitchen table. It was the same way he found her the morning before he went in to Stockton and that morning had ended with nothing, but a bleak outlook for their future together.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

_Waking up with a start, Jax looked to the other side of the bed and saw Abel still asleep, but Tara was gone. He wasn't too surprised by that. She had made it very obvious last night after they left his mother's that despite a near death experience, she had not forgotten the state of their relationship. They didn't talk, which was a sign in itself and she made sure to put even more distance between them when she insisted Abel sleep with them. He could understand her need to have their son close now that they had him back, but he knew putting Abel between them was also about putting up an actual physical barrier._

_Now in the morning light, there was no way to ignore the chasm that existed between them. Rolling out of bed, Jax placed pillows around Abel for protection and went to the bathroom. After washing up and changing into some jeans and a t-shirt, he step out into the hallway and followed the smell of coffee. He found Tara sitting at the table; fresh faced, dressed for the day and staring into her cup._

"_Hey."_

_She looked up, startled out of her daze and smiled hollowly. "Morning."_

"_How ya feeling?"_

"_Good. You?"_

_He nodded. "Good."_

_It was painfully silent for a moment before Tara decided to just nip it in the bud._

"_We need to talk." She was looking at him straight on now. "I haven't seen you in weeks and the last time I saw you…..it was not good." That was putting it lightly seeing as the last time she saw him, he had just finished screwing that slut. "I'd like for us to hash it all out right now, but today is probably going to be a busy day for you so we'll save it for later."_

_She had no idea how this day was going to unfold so he'd rather get it over with. "Tara-"_

"_No Jax." She stated firmly, a determined look on her face that left no room for resistance. "I really don't want to talk about this now." After everything that happened yesterday, she did not have the strength for this conversation. "We're going to go to this breakfast at the club, play happy family and we will deal with our completely fucked up relationship later."_

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

Later turned out to be fourteen months. And even though she visited him often with the boys, she never talk about their relationship. He tried once.

"Don't worry about us Jax. The only thing you need to concentrate on is getting out of here in the next year."

Knowing that he had her waiting for him on the outside was what he needed to get by. He knew the fact that she didn't want to give him any hope meant there was no hope to give. At this point, they didn't need to have a conversation for him to know what was going to happen. Even now, seeing the look on her face and reading her body, he knew how this was going to end.

"Is everything with the club okay?" She asked politely.

"Say whatever you need to say Tara."

She nodded. He didn't want her to mince word so here it was. "Now that you're home, I think it's best if I move back into my old house."

Crossing his arms over his chest, his jaw clenched as he snorted humorlessly. "For good right?"

"We tried Jax, but it's not going to work out for us."

"So things get a little crazy with the club, I go to jail and you bail on me."

"My decision has nothing to do with you going to jail or the club." She stressed, waiting to make that very clear. "I will never be okay with everything that the club does, but you want to change that, make it better right?" He nodded. He had told her in a letter while he was in prison about how he wanted to fix the club and the damage they had done to the brotherhood they once had. Like his father had wanted. "That's good. I want that, I support that."

She had come to realize that through Jax, she and the boys would forever be tied to SAMCRO. If the club went straight, their children would be a little safer. She wouldn't have to worry about them losing their father and she could breathe a little easier.

"But this is not about the club. I wish is was because then maybe it wouldn't hurt so damn much." She confessed miserably. She was letting down the guard she had up since before he went in, so he could see just how hurt she was. "This is about you treating me like I'm not a factor in your life. Like I'm not your family." She spoke, using his words to jog his memory of the moment their relationship died. It worked and she could see his defenses come down as the past came back to haunt him. "After all we've been through, all that we've been to each other, I'm not your family." She stated incredulously, on the verge of tears.

"I'm sorry. You know I didn't mean that."

She shook her head. "Yeah, until the next time." He frowned and she clarified as anger started to push through her voice. "You accuse me of running away, well you push me away. And then you go and screw other women, like Ima and apparently Wendy." She said bitterly, divulging the bit of news she was recently told.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

"_Thank you for letting me see Abel." Wendy said as she and Tara walked away from his room now that the toddler was taking a nap._

"_Sure." Tara nodded and led her to the front door to see her out._

"_I can only imagine how hard it was to convince Jax to go along with this."_

"_Jax doesn't know yet." She told her. "But he knows I only have our son's best interest at heart."_

"_Our son? Are you planning on adopting Abel?"_

"_I already have." Tara announced, somewhat defensively and crossing her arms in front of her. "It was finalized a few months after Jax went in."_

_Wendy looked a little stunned, but she quickly shook it off. "That's good and it's good to see you and Jax stayed together despite what happened between me and him." When Tara's face scrunched up, she misinterpreted it as anger and rushed to explain. "It was only one time and it was a mistake Tara."_

"_What are you talking about?" _

_Now seeing her look as confusion, it dawned on Wendy. "Oh shit. You didn't know. Look, forget I-"_

"_No. No. You tell me what happened. Right now." Tara demanded._

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

Jax scowled. "What the hell was Wendy doing here?" His anger rose at the thought of her showing her face just to start trouble for them.

"She came to see Abel before she moved to New York."

"And you let her?"

"Yes. She may not be his mother, but she did give birth to him."

"Hardly."

Tara shook her head dismissively. "It really doesn't matter. She's gone and she's not our problem." Not to be deterred by the least of their issues, she moved on to the gist of it. "Our problem is that I don't trust you and I don't think you trust me either." Jax looked taken aback, but he had to know that she was speaking the truth. Everything that went wrong between them wouldn't have happened otherwise. This conversation wouldn't be happening. They wouldn't be ending. "We have nothing without trust so we might as well cut our losses now."

"It sounds like you already have." He accused.

He couldn't believe this. He made one mistake and she was just giving up on them. She had made up her mind without even giving him a chance.

"What other choice do I have Jax." She was tired being insecure about their relationship and waiting for the other shoe to drop. As much as she loved Jax, she couldn't take any more heartache. "The house is being renovated; it'll be ready in a couple of days." She explained and he just huffed indifferently. "It'll give us enough time to explain things to the boys and get them used to a new routine." Thankfully they were still young and shouldn't have too much trouble adjusting to the changes. "I figured I can have them one week and you can have them the next. If something comes up during your week, I can take them and vice versus. Plus we have Neeta and your mom as backup."

"You got it all figured out." He sneered, his resentment towards the situation apparent. "I don't even need to say anything." If she wanted to go, he wasn't going to stop her.

"I'm sorry Jax."She tried to say more to make him understand, but he cut her off.

"Yeah. I'm gonna stay at the clubhouse. Let me know when you're moved out." He turned and walked out of the house, slamming the door behind him.

Tara jumped at the sound and listening to the roar of his engine starting up, then fading away, she couldn't hold it in any longer. Feeling her heart break all over again, her tears began to fall and she sobbed audibly in her hands.

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><p><strong>So are you liking my story? Yes. No. Maybe…..Give me your two cents. Feedback feeds the muse! :)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: SoA is not mine in any way, shape or form. It all belongs to KS.**

**Thanks to the _max _for the reviews, favs/follows and views! You guys rock! Keep them coming – I'm greedy LoL**

**So yeah, Jax is an asshat, but he won't be getting a pass here. Tara getting pregnant and kidnapped is not going to fix it.**

**Chapter Soundtrack – Let Me Go: 3 Doors Down**

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><p>Back at the clubhouse, more and more people were trickling in for the monster welcome home party. Devon was having a blast; meeting the new members and catching up with the old. She was playing darts with Kozik, Juice and Miles, cracking up as they razzed each other, when her mood was totally killed.<p>

"How'd it go Clay?" Tig asked, sitting at the bar with yet another croweater rubbing herself all over him.

Out the corner of her eye, Devon watched as Clay and her father talked. Perhaps feeling her glare, he turned and faced her.

"Hey kid. Welcome home."

"Thanks Clay." She replied coolly.

This was the first time since the attempted hit that Devon and Clay had come face to face. Devon refused to hide her loathe for him and Clay had the decency to at least appear to still feel guilty.

The club had gotten pass what he and Tig did, but it was unanimously believed that what went down was fucked up, especially its effect on Devon.

Uncomfortable with the way she was looking at him and how her return reminded him of his culpability, Clay walked away without another word.

Devon rolled her eyes, wishing she had her knife on her so she could stab him in the back. Like he had her. She turned back to the dart board, ready to take her next winning shot, but the guys were no longer focused on the game. They were staring at something behind her.

She heard a throat clear and a deep familiar voice spoke. "Devon."

Her mood lifted right back up and she turned around to face her husband. "Hiya Harry." She greeted him sweetly and discreetly gave him a top to bottom look. He was still so big, strong and damn hot, especially with the longer hair.

Since the day she realized boys weren't disgusting, just looking at Opie made her want to melt at his feet. He was the only person who could shut her up and put her in her place when she got too out of hand. All it took was one hard look and that only made her want him even more. Even now that hadn't changed.

"Great seeing you. Congratulations on the engagement." She proclaimed gushingly with a big, phony smile. "When were you planning on telling me you were getting married? Seeing as _we're_ still married and everything."

He glared down at her with his arms crossed over his broad chest. "I wasn't. I was just going to send you the divorce papers." He replied callously.

"Oh how nice." Sarcasm was dripping from her lips, but her eyes were lit with anger.

"What did you expect? It's been two years."

"Well in that case, how about I sign them now?"

"I haven't filed yet." He admitted.

She smiled triumphantly and tested him. "Then we should definitely get that taken care of while I'm here."

Opie gritted out through clenched teeth. "Fine."

"Fine." Her smile was a mile wide now.

Earlier today, when he first returned from Stockton with the guys, she felt his eyes on her, but he kept his distance. Approaching her now, he did so all aloof and unaffected. She knew it was a rouse. All she had to do was push the right button and now she could see what was really underneath.

It had been two years, he was engaged to another woman, yet he hadn't even filed for divorce.

Yeah, he wasn't fooling anybody.

"About time you came home." Someone said, interrupting the tension between the couple.

Devon looked around Opie and beamed. Pushing him out of the way, she dashed over to hug the closest thing she had to a brother.

"Jax." She exclaimed happily.

"It's so good to see you." He hugged her tight. "How ya been?"

"I've been good." She nodded confidently and cracked. "Mesa's no Charming, but I still manage to find trouble to get into."

"I'm sure you do." He chuckled. "So how long you gonna be in town?"

"Well." She started. "Longer than I expected apparently." Pivoting back towards Opie, she gave him a sassy grin.

It did the trick. He grunted in frustration and stalked away.

"Anyway." Devon continued. "Come here." She tugged on his sleeve and he followed her over to a quieter spot along the wall bar. "Are you okay?"

He looked perplexed before it dawned on her. "You knew."

"Yeah." His jaw tightened, making his chin jut out and he shifted on his feet, obviously irritated. "She needed someone to talk to Jax. I wasn't going to turn her away or betray her confidence." She said, defending herself and Tara. "She's still just as much my best friend as you are."

Devon had known Jax all her life, but she and Tara had been through a lot together.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

In the summer of 1994, Devon and Tara were finally introduced to each other by their boyfriends. Before then, they both knew of each other, but they ran in different circles – Tara the loner and Devon the SAMCRO princess. While Devon couldn't wait to meet the girl she had heard about all the way in Mesa; the one who had the Prince of Charming head over heels in love in a matter of months. Tara, on the other hand, was apprehensive about meeting the "hellion" that Jax and Opie had told her all about. But once they finally met, it didn't take long for them to hit it off.

Devon wasn't nearly as wild as the guys made her out to be. She was a really sweet person and whenever she was around her, Tara found herself having a good time. Given the fact that her mother was dead and her father was too busy in the bottom of a bottle to pay her any mind, it was hard for Tara to trust and depend on people. Devon was different. She was so straightforward and never pulled punches; it was hard _not_ to trust her.

Initially, Devon didn't get how such a quiet, introverted girl had captured Jax's attention the way she had. Taking the time to get to know her, she found that Tara was like her – sugar and sweet on the outside, a little devil on the inside. Despite being so unassuming, she knew how to have fun and could hold her own if anyone challenged her. Devon felt like she had finally found herself a sidekick. One that didn't stare at her chest or act like an ego inflated ass. Plus she finally had someone to go shopping and do makeovers with. Tara was hesitant at first, but Devon pulled her out of her shell and together that summer, the two girls gained themselves a bit of a reputation.

Pissed at her father once again for the latest Tig-esque bullshit he had pulled, Devon decided to steal his bike for a trip to the mall in Stockton and she dragged Tara along.

"I'm not so sure about this Devon." Tara stood beside her new friend as she sat on the picnic table top eying the two wheeler in question.

"Oh come on Tara. Nothing's going to happen." She assured her. "My dad'll probably yell at us, but it's easy to tune him out."

"Yeah, but isn't taking a Son's bike like a major no-no."

"For anyone that's not us." She scoffed smugly. "We're Jax's and Opie's girls, we're untouchable!" She was also the Sargent-at-Arms daughter. No one messed with her for fear of Tig's wrath. As her friend, she would make sure Tara was under the same protection. "Come on, it's going to be hilarious." Her father and the rest of the board were in church, Jax and Opie were cleaning up the clubhouse from last night's mess and everyone else out in the lot was working. It was the perfect time to do it. "Come on. You know you want to. I can see that look in your eyes." She cajoled Tara who was fighting back a smile.

"Ok fine." She conceded, no longer able to resist the thrill.

After coming up with a quick plan, Tara slipped out of the lot and a ways down the street to wait. Playing it cool and inconspicuous, Devon approached her father's bike. As expected the keys were still in the ignition for easy departure. Stupid, stupid man. Pulling her hair in a bun to hide it, she put on his helmet, stole a second off of Bobby's bike and fired up the engine. A single engine starting was nothing out of the ordinary so no one paid it any mind and she took off out of TM undetected.

Despite the anxiety surging through her, Tara giggled when Devon pulled up next to her.

"Let's go." She said, tossing the extra helmet at her. Tara fitted it on her head, climbed on behind her and with a whoop of victory, they headed out of town.

Two hours later, they returned to Charming and were promptly pulled over by Chief Unser who had been on the lookout for the bike after Clay notified him of the theft. When he strolled up next to the suspects, he laughed raucously. He couldn't wait to escort them back to the clubhouse.

Devon was bummed that they hadn't gotten away with it scot-free, but then again what fun would this be without an audience? Her father was obviously in a tizzy to have called the cops for help. Served him right. She couldn't wait to see his face.

Poor Tara was the odd man out, not anywhere as amused as they were. No matter what Devon said, she knew they were in so much trouble. She had just started dating Jax, was just getting to know the world he was a part of and she had screwed up already. She had gotten too comfortable with Devon and let her guard down. At least, it was fun while it lasted. She just wanted to get this over with; face the firing squad and hopefully make it out alive.

The missing bike rolled back to SAMCRO with Unser following. The guys were all outside and moved forward to meet the thief with some good ol' fashion payback. However, when their faces became recognizable, all their bravado fell away to be replaced by snickers of laughter.

Tig's eyed bugged out and his face turned red when he saw his own daughter park his stolen bike. "What the fuck?! You two took my bike?!"

"Calm down Dad, before you give yourself a stroke." Devon said, not even blinking at his yelling as she and Tara took off the helmets and dismounted. She tossed his keys at him. "Thanks for letting us borrow it. We got the new Nine Inch Nails CD at the mall."She sing-sung gleefully.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He looked at her as if she was the craziest person he's ever seen.

"Nothing. Well I'm hungry. Let's go to Lumpy's and get some food." She turned to Tara who was standing there looking torn between being afraid and amused. "I'll be home after we eat. Okay Daddy?" She spoke nonchalantly as a challenge rather than informatively. She was daring anyone to try to scare her or Tara and before anyone could, she hooked arms with her friend and began to walk away. "See you guys later."

"You get back here!"

"Yeah. Uh huh. Bye Dad." She waved backwards, not even bothering to stop or turn around.

"She's fucking insane." Tig amazed, powerless to retaliate. She was his kid so he couldn't kick her ass. Discipline was foreign concept to him and even if he tried, she had stopped listening to him a long time ago.

The guys were out right laughing at him now.

"She got it honestly." Bobby said, thinking about the time Isabel slashed the tires and keyed the fenders on his bike when Tig got caught with a croweater. Devon was her mother's child.

"Jax, Opie – go make sure they don't get into anymore shit. Jesus Christ." Clay said just as amused, but exasperated over the two troublemakers.

The boys gleefully hopped on their bikes to chase after their girlfriends. Sure stealing a man's bike was fucked up, but how awesome was it to have girls who pulled off a prank like that against a Son without consequence?

That was the beginning of a great friendship, a sisterhood of their own that rivaled the brotherhood of their significant others.

In the years that followed for the two friends, school days were filled with phone calls and letters keeping each other up to date with the on-goings in their lives, and the SAMCRO and Charming gossip. Summer days were the best of course.

A week after school ended, Devon would come back to Charming with her man and her two best friends waiting her arrival. They spent their freedom from homework, curfews and chores, hanging out around town, bike riding, going to the movies and Fun Town, and partying at the club. It was the time of their lives, but as they got older, the girls in particular, started thinking about the future and realized the party had to stop.

While the boys dropped out and got their GEDs, the girls finished school and started looking towards college. Devon's plan was to have the best of both worlds – a business woman and wife/Old Lady to Opie. Tara's plan didn't allow for her to have a foot in both worlds, let alone in Charming. The reality of her dilemma became more and more apparent the closer graduation approached.

The day finally arrived and Tara decided to concentrate on the positives of her accomplishment – a 3.8 GPA and a diploma with honors. It was hard not to be happy that day, especially given the loud and proud cheering from Jax, Opie, some of the other Sons, Gemma and Luann following the announcement of her name. Over the course of the two years she and Jax had been dating, they had become like family to her and it was nice to have them there. It help to make up for her father's obvious absence.

A few days after graduation, Devon came back to town, her own diploma to show off and the club threw her and Tara a huge graduation party.

Tara was having a great time until reality crept into her head and she started looking at her surroundings differently. She started seeing the faces, the clubhouse, TM and the packed lot as if it would be the last time she saw them. Sadness came over her and she needed a break from the celebration.

Noticing that her best friend was missing, Devon went in search for her.

"There you are. You okay?" She said when she landed on top of the roof when Tara was hiding.

"Yeah I'm fine."

"No, you're not." Devon countered and sat down next to her. "You're worried about Now."

"Now what?"

"Exactly." She declared. "We both know what my _Now What _involves and it includes Charming in about 4 more years. That's not the case for you." Tara wanted to be a doctor. She had been volunteering at St. Thomas since she was a freshman. There was no way anyone could become a doctor and stay in this town. She could tell that Tara knew this, she just didn't want to face it. "Look I can see you don't want to talk about this and that's okay. But what kind of best friend would I be if I didn't give you some advice." Tara grinned reluctantly. Devon wouldn't be Devon if she wasn't expressing her opinion, wanted or not. "I think you should do what makes you happy. Not anyone else…..Including Jax." Tara shifted her eyes to her, clearly surprised that she wasn't sticking up for her childhood friend. "I love Jax, he's like my brother, but if he really loves you, whatever makes you happy, should make him happy." Jax could be a brat sometimes, but he needed to grow up and be more selfless. Especially when it came to the girl he loved. "If it doesn't, then he doesn't deserve you or anyone else for that matter."

Tara had heard every word Devon said that night, but only in her dreams could she go away to college with Jax's blessing and have him wait for her until she finished. Besides, going to school was just part of it. Getting out of Charming was also the goal.

Putting school on hold, she tried to find a different path for herself in Charming and be happy with it. But she had always felt like she was drowning in that town. Jax had become like a life preserver for her and he was slipping away from her, getting more involved in the club – putting his life and freedom on the line. It was time for her to sink or swim. She had to make a real life for herself, one that could bring her some happiness and stability. That life was not in Charming.

She started applying to colleges in California for the spring semester. She was accepted to UCSD and her distant cousin in San Diego agreed to let her stay with them. She had a solid plan, but she couldn't got through with it without at least trying to convince Jax to come with her.

Knowing in her gut, what he was going to say and terrified of saying goodbye to him, she prolonged her confession as long as possible. Showing up at his apartment in the clubhouse less than an hour before her bus was scheduled to leave, she barely gave him a chance to greet her and blurted it out.

"I'm leaving Charming Jax and I want you to come with me."

"What?"

"I hate it here. You're the only one who make me happy and I feel like I'm losing you." She admitted dejectedly. "Even if I'm not losing you, I can't stay here."

Jax was so thrown by her outburst that he couldn't speak.

His silence scared her so she rushed to explain. "I know this is your home, but we can be each other's home."

He shook his head trying to wrap his mind around this. He felt like he was in a dream, a nightmare.

"We can come back later." Tara compromised, looking for something that would make him happy and get him to run away with her. "But I need to go. Now. I won't make it here any longer."

"You're leaving me?" He finally spoke, anguish on his face and in his voice.

"No. Not if you came with me. Please?"

"I can't leave my family and my club, Tara." He outraged, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I can't believe you're making me choose."

"That's not what I'm doing!" She was panicking now, feeling like the walls were closing in.

She knew he wouldn't leave, but she had held on so tight to the smallest hope that he would. That hope was fading right before her eyes until it was gone and her heart began to break. This was the end of her and Jax.

Tears began to well in her eyes. "You don't have to come with me, but I can't stay. I can't!" She exclaimed frantically. If she couldn't get him to come with her, she needed him to understand why she was leaving. It would kill her if he hated her after this.

She looked like a caged animal to Jax, at the end of her rope and ready to run. He couldn't let that happen. He started begged and pleaded with her not to go.

It was the hardest thing she had ever done, but she managed to steel herself from his desperate words and tears.

When he realized it was a lost cause, he raged at her, called her a liar for telling him that she loved him and letting him believe they would always be together. He told her if she was getting out of Charming, she better stay out of Charming.

Tara rushed out of the clubhouse without saying anything to anyone. She couldn't stand to have any more looks or words of betrayal lobbed at her. Using all her strength, she kept herself together all the way to the bus depot and through the boarding. But as she watched Charming pass by her window seat, seeing so many places that reminded her of the good times, her life with Jax, she fell apart. She cried until she had nothing left.

She was in San Diego for a week before she couldn't take it any longer. She needed help.

Devon had heard all about Tara leaving Jax and Charming. She had predicted that it would happen so she wasn't upset or shocked. Just like she wasn't shocked when Tara appeared on her doorstep.

It made sense that she would come in search of support from people who would know exactly what she was feeling. Both Devon and her mother knew what it was like to have to separate yourself from the person you loved for your own sake.

Not to mention, Charming had been slowly, but surely suffocating Tara all her life. Hell, Charming was suffocating for Devon sometimes, but unlike Tara, she had a place to escape to and other people out in the "real world" to lean on. Tara would have gone crazy in Charming and then what use would she have been to anyone, least of all Jax.

Tara ended up staying with them in Mesa until she had to go back to start school. From that point on while she attended UCSD, she was in Mesa for the few weeks before classes resumed. And every year, the two best friends went on a Spring Break trip together.

When Tara finished her pre-med, she moved to Chicago while Devon returned to Charming permanently. The extreme distance put a strain on their friendship, but they stayed in contact through the occasionally phone call or email. When Opie went to jail and Devon took off back to Mesa, after a call from Isabel, Tara showed up for a weekend to help cheer her up.

All the while no one back in Charming, not even Opie, was aware of their continued friendship. It wouldn't do anybody any good to know.

Unfortunately, without warning, Tara broke off all contact after she started dating Joshua Kohn.

Devon was pissed and wrote her off until she returned to Charming and the truth about the crazy, obsessed ATF agent came to light.

Their friendship was just getting back on track when Devon's "accident" happened and she left. Tara reached out to her, but she only responded once and it was very indifferent. At the time, Devon was too angry and resentful towards anything or anyone related to the club.

They didn't speak again until Devon got a collect call from Stockton Penitentiary from her father. She swallowed her pride and finally called Tara to find out what had happened. Hearing the distress in her old friend's voice as she explained the chaos of the last year, Devon offered her full support. Over the course of those fourteen months that the guys were inside, they talked more frequently and their friendship was restored.

Now they were both in Charming again, only this time their relationships were in shambles and they were each trying to navigate their way through the rubble. They would need to lean on each other now more than ever.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

"I'm sorry Jax." Devon said genuinely.

He may have been an asshole lately, but he did love Tara. In the past, the circumstances weren't right for them, now it seemed like he just couldn't get out of his own way.

Jax nodded, appreciating her concern and she kissed him on the cheek. "I have to run. I'll see you later." Collecting her things, she left the clubhouse to see how Tara was holding up.

Jax ambled over to the bar where Opie now sat and took the stool next to him.

"Why aren't you home with Tara?" He asked. Jax had just come off a fourteen month stint. He should be taking advantage of being back with his Old Lady.

"She's moving out." He took out a cigarette and lit it, taking a deep pull. "She says I don't treat her like she matters and she doesn't trust me."

Opie wasn't entirely shocked that Tara was pissed. She and Jax weren't on good terms before they went to Ireland. He thought it had been resolved once they got back. Apparently it hadn't and his time in Stockton had only gave all that hurt time to fester.

"Can't fuckin' win, man." Jax lamented.

"Join the club. Dev and I are getting a divorce." Opie revealed.

"You ready for that?"

"You ready for Tara to leave you?" He threw the obvious back at him. "She doesn't want to be with me. It's pointless to keep dragging it out."

Jax took another puff from his cigarette and exhaled heavily. "Welcome fuckin' home."

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Devon reached Jax's house, finding the door unlocked so she let herself in. She immediately heard the sound of muffled crying coming from the living room.

There was Tara, curled up on the couch, hugging her knees and crying into her crossed arms.

"Oh honey." Devon cooed and sat down next to her, enveloping her in a hug. "I'm so sorry Tara."

She looked up from her burrow, her broken face streaked with tears. "He barely say anything Devon. He didn't even try to stop me. Nothing. Like he doesn't even care, like we're not worth fighting for."

She had expected a fight from Jax. When he just stood there so detached and uncaring, it made it worse because it proved everything she'd been feeling – like she didn't matter to him.

"I thought this was it. That this was finally going to be our time." She cried, growing furious with Jax. "I stayed, I trusted him, I was learning to accept the club and he just threw it in my face." Wiping her face, Tara sat up straight and resolved. "I'm done living my life for Jax." She had opened herself back up to him and risked so much to make them work. In the end, it was all for nothing. "I have to start thinking about what's best for myself and especially my boys."

Devon couldn't agree more. Jax had blown his chance and Tara had more important things in her life to focus on besides his bullshit. "You know I'll help you any way you need me to."

Smiling gratefully, Tara reach out to hug her friend.

As much as she would have liked to spend the rest of the day in bed, crying. She had to be functional for Abel and Thomas.

When they woke from their nap, Devon was still at the house so she distracted them while Tara went into the bathroom to make herself more presentable. After assuring Devon that she was okay, she was left alone and spent the rest of the day seeing to her boys. It was the perfect distraction for the broken heart she had once again.

Bedtime came and Abel was asking for his father. Tara tried to deflect his questions, but it wasn't working. He knew his dad was back and he wanted to see him.

She wasn't prepared to face Jax so soon after breaking things off, but she wouldn't let her failed relationship with their father effect their relationship with him. She bit the bullet and called him.

He didn't pick up so she left a message telling him that the boys needed him. Moments later, he called back. He was very abrupt with her, but he agreed to come home and say goodnight to them.

Abel was thrilled to see him and tried to get out of bed to play, but it was pass his bedtime. Thankfully, he settled for a bedtime story. Thomas was half asleep, but Jax held him as he read to his sons until they both were completely out.

Tara had left the three of them to have their moment alone and was in the kitchen washing the dishes from dinner.

"They're asleep." Jax announced as he walked into the room.

"Good." She smiled at him weakly. Rinsing her hands and drying them with a dish towel, she faced him. "Thanks for coming."

"So is this how it's gonna be from now on?" He questioned. "You really want this?"

Holding on to the rim of the sink, she leaned back against it. "I can't have what I really want Jax." She answered sadly, but truthfully. She would never deny wanting to be with him. The question was, did he want to be with her because she couldn't tell anymore. "I'm going to have to be happy with this." She refused to settle for love that was given and then taken away whenever the mood struck him.

Once again Jax was silent, but this time, his face held a bit of a challenge. As if he was giving her one last chance to change her mind.

She wasn't biting. There was no going back, not to the way they used to be.

"Call me if the boys need anything." He spoke and turned to walk out of the house.

Tara closed her eyes against the sting from his indifference and a single tear rolled down her cheek.

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><p><strong>If anyone finds Jax's lack of response confusing, don't worry. You'll get a glimpse into his head next chapter.<strong>

**I don't want to give specifics away, but I know personally, its difficult for me to continue reading or watching anything where my favorite character dies or my favorite ship doesn't end up together. So with that said...fear not dear readers ;)**

**Let me know what you think! Feedback feeds the muse! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I own not one iota of SoA. That's all KS.**

**Thank you to the max for all the reviews, follows/favs, and views! The response to the last chapter was so overwhelming. I'm so appreciative. You guys are the shiznit! Shout out to my guest reviewers since I can't respond to you directly – I'm glad you like my OC Devon and her friendship with Tara. It's definitely a Sisters before Misters revolution in Charming when those two team up. **

**So both Jax and Opie are idiots that have some work to do if they want their women back….Of course they have to get past their bruised egos first…..RME…Men LoL**

**Chapter Soundtrack ~ Broken: Seether feat. Amy Lee**

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><p>The next day, Tara had no time left for tears. She had made a decision and she needed to stick with it. Right now, she had to focus on putting the finishing touches on the move.<p>

With the exception of the guest bathroom, the rest of the house was done. All the carpeting had been pulled up and replaced in the boys' room. The plumbing and appliances had been updated. Every room was repainted and all the new furniture had arrived.

While the contractors were working in the bathroom, she was doing some decorating and Devon had come over to help.

"So what were you up to last night?"

"Not much. I was tired so I went back to the clubhouse to get keys from Piney, slammed a porn star's head into the bar top, and went to bed."

Tara's eyes widened. "Lyla?"

"No." Devon grinned deviously.

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

_Winding through the crowd of people that littered the lot and inside the clubhouse, Devon elbowed her way up to the bar. "Hey Piney, I need your keys." She yelled._

_He nodded at her, finishing up some shots he was pouring for a few people. _

_Glancing around the room, Devon stopped when she spotted the scene at the end of the bar._

_Jax was sitting there, flanked by Opie and Chibs, but it was the blonde all over him that intrigued her._

"_Here you go darlin'."_

_Smiling briefly, she pocketed the keys. "Thanks Piney." She poked her chin in their direction. "Who's the croweater with Jax?"_

"_That's no croweater. She's one of the CaraCara girls. Ima." He said knowingly and when her eyes narrowed, he chuckled. "Have fun little girl." He slapped the bar and ambled down the line, getting closer and closer to where the show would begin._

_She didn't move at first. Instead she watched the interaction between Jax and the porn star. Surprisingly enough, he seemed apathetic towards her, almost annoyed as he deflected her attempts to feel him up. She obviously wasn't getting the message that he wasn't interested. _

_Devon decided to take it upon herself to make her see the light._

_With a cocky grin on her face, she strutted down the bar and positioned herself in between Jax and Chibs. "So Jax, who's your friend?" She casually leaned against the bar, propped on her elbow. _

_Knowing all too well what was about to go down, Jax, Opie and Chibs each put some distance between themselves and the two women._

_Ignorant as to who she was talking to and too concerned with trying to stake her claim on Jax, Ima was oblivious. "I'm Ima."She announced, standing smugly with her hand on her cocked hip._

"_Oh you're Ima." Devon's responding grin was almost maniacal. In the blind of an eye, she grabbed her by the back of the head and slammed her face into the bartop._

"_Holy shite!" Chibs's amused exclamation and Ima's scream drew everyone's attention to the confrontation._

"_I'm Devon. Nice to meet you." She told the blonde who had slid down to the ground holding her broken and bloody nose. "You boys have fun with her now." She looked to Jax with a wide smile. _

**%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%**

"Dev." Tara admonished even though she was laughing.

"What? I couldn't hit the porn star I really wanted so I figured I could at least get some retribution for you."

"You're horrible."

"You love me." She gloated and blew her a kiss.

They both were laughing as they went back to hanging a collection of black and white photos in the living room.

Suddenly the front door opened. When they looked to see who the uninvited guest was, Tara sighed heavily.

"I knew it was only a matter of time." She muttered to Devon. "Come right in Gemma."

The SAMCRO matriarch walked in like she always did, as if everyone in the room should bow down to her.

Not to today, not in this house.

"The place looks nice." Tara just smiled, wanting to get this over with because Gemma certainly wasn't here to compliment her decorating skills. "Devon, sweetie, how about you give me and Tara a minute alone."

Devon looked to Tara to see how she felt about that. Once she gave her a nod, she excused herself, headed to the boys' room where some curtains needed to be hung.

"Be nice Mama Gemma." She warned and left the room.

"Having it fixed up to sell huh?" Gemma repeated the lie she had feed her to explain the renovation.

"Change of plans." Tara replied flatly.

"No, this was always your plan honey. It's the way you've always operated. You twist Jax all up and then you abandon him."

"Our relationship is none of your business."

"He's my son."

"You're _grown_ son who's quite capable of taking care of himself." She really did not want to waste any of her energy on Gemma, but she definitely wasn't going to be railroaded. "Why are you so upset about Jax and I being over? You got what you wanted. You've never really wanted us together."

"With good reason."

"Why are you here?" She asked exasperatingly. This conversation was pointless. No matter what, she would never be good enough for Jax and he would always be the innocent victim in his mother's eyes.

"I'm here to make sure a few things are clear." Putting her hands on her waist, Gemma moved closer to Tara, trying to intimidate her. "You and Jax may be over, but he is still those boys' father. If you think you're going to keep them away from him or the rest of their family, you are wrong."

"Not that I owe you an explanation, but whenever possible, the boys will be spending equal time with me and Jax." Tara moved closer as well. She was not about to let Gemma dictate how _her_ children would be raised. "I would never deprive them of their father."

"The same father that's a part of the club that you hate remember?" She smiled smugly, thinking she could trip Tara up. "What, all of a sudden you're not going to worry about what the club might do to the boys?"

"I will always worry about something hurting my children. With Jax as their father, I have to worry a little bit more. But I won't take them from him." She spoke earnestly. "I'm going to trust him to keep them safe." Yes, both the boys' lives had been put in danger once because of the club, but Tara was willing to give Jax another chance especially given his desire to go straight. "Besides it's not like begin around the club is going to be an everyday thing for the boys. They'll be in daycare during the week and-"

"Daycare?"

"Yes Gemma. They're going to go to daycare, just like they are going to go to school, summer camps, play on sports teams. They will know that there is more to life than SAMCRO and Charming."

"So you're gonna brainwash them against us?"

Pushed to her limit, Tara snapped. "I'm trying to be civil here with you because you don't want to go to war with me over my kids. You will lose." She drew herself to her full height and stood closer to her, menacingly. "I will do any and everything to give them the best life possible." She stressed. "At anyone's expense, including Jax."

Gemma's lips pursed, a clear sign that she was pissed. Tara could care less. She wasn't afraid, not when it came to her kids.

A self-assured grin grew on her face and she clarified. "I'm pretty sure you don't want to be the cause of any pain that your son might feel should you push me and force me to take the boys away."

"Is that a threat?"

"It's a promise." She walked over to her front door and opened it. "Have a nice day."

"Well there it is. I was wondering where that clever bitch was hiding." Gemma sneered and bumped her as she walked out.

Tara closed the door behind her and clapping her hands, Devon came out of the hallway. "Well done."

She shrugged. She was just as over Gemma, as she was Jax. She wasn't going to be overlooked or dismissed any longer.

_She_ was Abel and Thomas's mother, not Gemma. Jax was the only other person who had any say in their lives. If anyone had a problem with that, they could go to hell….Including Jax.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Arriving at TM for a meeting with the club, Jax parked on the side of the lot and was quickly approached by his mother.

"Jackson, we need to talk."

"About what?" He asked as he pulled off his helmet.

"Tara. She's threatening to take the boys."

His eyebrows rose above his shades. "Really?" Climbing off his bike, he removed them and stood in front of his mother, looking at her critically. "What did you do to make her say that?" He wasn't stupid. He knew how his mother operated and she was never innocent in any altercation with his exes.

"You're putting this on me?" She balked.

"Tara wouldn't take the boys away unless she had a good reason." He fired back. "Reasons like this shit that Clay's got us into." He purposely mentioned, wanting her put the spotlight on the fact that it was her own husband that was jeopardizing her family.

On the defense, she reminded him. "Clay's just doing what's best for the club."

"We'll see about that." He said doubtfully.

With this new business arrangement Clay had set up behind their backs, his plans for the club had been put on hold. But once the job was done, Clay promised to step down peaceably and pass the gavel to him. They just needed to get through this shit first.

"As for you." He continued. "When it comes to Abel and Thomas, I can't stop you from having an opinion, but come to me about it." He looked her dead in the eyes and ordered. "Leave Tara alone. You start up a feud with her, _I'm_ going to make it difficult for you to be a part of the boys' lives." His relationship with Tara was already torn, he didn't need his meddling mother making things worse between them. He turned his back on her and walked away. He had made his point, there was no room for discussion.

Gemma was completely thrown. She couldn't believe Jax had taken Tara's side over hers. But then again, she had to remind herself that her son was at a crossroads.

Jax had just gotten out of prison, his family was broken and he was not pleased with the club's new direction. She needed to take a step back and just support whatever decisions he made. If she pushed, he could end up going down the wrong path. He just needed time and space. He would get used to being back home, back in his seat as VP and future President who did was what best for the club.

And Tara – she would eventually show her true colors. In the meantime, she could be patient, play nice. It would all work out the way it was meant to.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Tara had an early day at the hospital so she was at home doing the last bit of organizing now that she and the boys had officially moved. She was taking some trash out to the curb when a motorcycle turned down her street. She immediately recognized it as Jax. Headed back up the drive, by the time she reached the porch, he was pulling up.

"Hey." She greeted him once he turned off the engine.

"I'm surprised you're home."

"Short day." She explained.

"You busy? There's something I want to talk to you about?"

Curious to see where this was headed, she invited him in.

They walked into the living room; he took a seat on the couch and she sat on the chair beside it.

"So what's up?"

Leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, he started the inevitably heated conversation. "My mom told me what happened the other day."

Tara rolled her eyes. "Let me guess – she ran to you claiming I was mean to her and now you're here to tell me to play nice so she doesn't go off the rails."

He grinned at her mocking. "Yes and no." She gave him a questioning look and he revealed. "I told her to lay off of you. She won't be bothering you again."

"For how long?"

"For good." He emphasized. "She messes with you, tell me and I will take care of it." She was clearly unconvinced so he added. "I promise."

"Okay." She replied, thinking only time would tell.

He knew she didn't believe him, but she would see.

"So the boys are taking a nap?"

"No." Tara responded slowly, almost nervously. He hadn't mentioned it so obviously Gemma hadn't said anything. She knew he wasn't going to like this. "They're in daycare."

"Daycare." He reiterated. "Since when do they go to daycare?"

"Today is their first day. A trial actually, to see how they handle it." She explained. "I haven't gotten a phone call so it looks like it's a success." The boys were hesitant at first, but she knew that was normal so she wasn't going to jump the gun and pull them out. "I would like for them to continue going."

"Were you planning on tell me?" He glared accusingly.

"Of course I was." She exclaimed. "It's just daycare Jax. They get to learn and play with other kids their own age instead of hang around a bunch of grown-ups all day getting no real mental stimulation." He grimaced, not fully on board with the idea. "Come on Jax, don't fight me on this. Let me give the boys a little bit of normal to balance out all the craziness they get with you."

He snorted, trying and failing to hold in a chuckle. She did have a point. The boys would only benefit from the enrichment. "Fine." He conceded.

"Great." She cheered, smiling brightly. "The boys will love it, the caretakers are excellent and the daycare is right in the hospital so I'll be able to keep an eye on them." He nodded, feeling a little more comfortable about her plan. "Thank you." She reached out to touch his arm in a show of gratitude and he winced. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He tried to move away from her, but she unzipped the front of his hoodie and pulling it open over his arm, revealing his cut and his white t-shirt. The sleeve was spotted with blood and she lifted it to see a soiled bandaged wrapped around his bicep.

"Really Jax?" She huffed and he prepared himself for a lecture. "Neither one of us wants it to be like this between us, but I would hope that we could still be friends and asked each other for help if we need it." She chided him. "While I can't risk my life or my freedom or my career anymore, I can do this. Let me."

With the life Jax led, getting hurt was part of the deal. She was done incriminating him for it, but she was done tagging along as well. Still, she couldn't sit by and do nothing if he was hurt.

He was more than surprised that she was mad that he hadn't come to her for a patch up instead of berating him about being in a shoot-out. Staring at her, he could see her honest concern for his well-being and acquiesced.

She moved closer and removed the bandage to get a better look at the wound. It was clearly made by a bullet, but luckily it had only grazed him. "This needs stitches."

"I figured."

"Come on." She directed him to follow her into the kitchen. "Sit down. Take off your jacket, your cut and roll up your sleeve."

He did as he was instructed and she went to the laundry room to retrieve her kit. She came back and pulled a chair up beside him.

"Next time just come here." She told him as she started taking out supplies and lining them up on the table. "Same goes for the guys too, okay?"

He nodded. "Alright."

The room grew silent as Tara set to work, cleaning and mending the wound. Despite the occasional sting from the needle, Jax found himself relaxing, being lulled by her gentle care and her proximity.

It had been so long since he had been this close to her. Her warm breath and soft hands on his skin felt so good. God, he missed her.

He didn't want this separation. He wanted it to be like it was before Abel was taken. Before he made one of the biggest mistakes of his life.

But he had done it for her own good. Even now, she was probably better off without him in her life.

Yet, he wanted Tara back. He'd been in love with her since he was sixteen. They had been apart for ten years and they managed to find their way back to one another. They had two kids together. He didn't want to give up on that.

Unfortunately, she had.

What was he supposed to do about that? Yell, cry, beg for her to take him back?

He'd done that before and she still left him. He refused to reduce himself to that again.

She declared them over so they were over. He would never stop wanting her, but he was letting go.

"All fixed." Tara announced and applied an antiseptic cream along the stitches before she wrapped a clean gauze around his bicep.

"Thanks Tara." He said.

They both stood; Tara began to clean up and Jax put his clothes back on to leave.

"So I'll see you later."

"Okay." She replied.

They stood in front of each other, only a few feet apart, wearing soft smiles that didn't reach their eyes.

Neither wants him to go. Both wanted to reach out and hold each other.

But too much had happened between them and they were at an impasse to resolve it.

Hopefully, with time, they would at least be able to be around one another without feeling that aching burn of longing in their chests.

* * *

><p><strong>So, finally some insight into Jax's feelings about the break up. He's a complex guy. I feel like he's got a bit of a split personality. There's the good guy, good father, good partner who wants to do right by those he loves. Then there's the opposite – the impulsive, selfish and sometime down right bratty guy who only shows really concern for the club. So I was aiming to capture those conflicting sides. Let's hope he gets it together soon because him and Tara so belong together.<strong>

**Let me know what you think. Feedback feeds the muse! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:**** I own nada of SoA. All belongs to KS…...In case, a McCoor's or a Mike McCoor aren't just figments of my imagination – I don't own any of that either.**

**You guys rock the casbah! Thanks to the max for all the reviews, fav/follows and views! Keep them coming! I love hearing your thoughts and opinions on how the story is unfolding.**

**So this chapter is probably one of my favorites. I hope you all enjoy it as well….  
>Beware for any Clay lovers….<br>**

**Chapter Soundtrack ~ _Comedown_: Bush; this is the song Tara and Devon reminisce over. To me, this seems like a song that they would have loved as teens.**

* * *

><p>On her way home from the hospital, Tara saw the lights still on at Izzy's and Devon's sports car parked out front. The boys were with Jax this week so she decided to stop in.<p>

Devon was sweeping up the shop when she heard knocking at the door. "We're closed!" She called out, not bothering to address whoever it was directly.

"It's me!"

She looked out front to see Tara standing there waving. Setting the broom up against the nearest wall, she walked across the salon floor and let her in. "Hey. What's up?"

Tara groaned, lifting her messenger bag off her shoulder and collapsing into a styling chair. "I'm exhausted."

"St. Thomas was busy?" Devon asked surprisingly until it dawned on her. "What did they do?"

"Nothing." She said, knowing she was referred to the club. "The hospital wasn't busy at all. It's just, I'm worn out Dev. Jax and I are over and this co-parenting thing is actually working out, but it's not any easier. It's harder…..I miss him." She admitted, her eyes misting over with tears.

Devon reached out to hug her. "I know how you feel, but it'll be okay." She assured her. "You did it before Tara, you can do it again."

"Ugh!" She growled in frustration, wiping her tears away. "I just need to get over him and move on with my life."

_Easier said than done_. Devon thought to herself, speaking from experience. Suddenly an idea popped in her head. "I know exactly how you can start." Tara's eyebrows rose in question. "A makeover. Nothing drastic, more like a replenishment now that you're single." She started describing how she would treat her to a whole spa package – hair styling, facial, manicure and pedicure. "You'll be a renewed sexy doctor mommy, make Jax wish he never lost you. Although he's already walking around here like a sad little puppy dog."

Not wanting to think about Jax right now, Tara turned the tables on her. "Opie's not looking too hot now-a-days himself."

"Op's a mad little puppy dog."

Whenever she ran into him at the clubhouse, he was always grumpy. According to Jax, he was in a perpetual bad mood with everyone lately. She was certain that she was part of the reason and she couldn't help, but feel some satisfaction from that. She had gotten under his skin again with hardly any effort. It would only be a matter of time before he gave in and finally came after her.

"You plan on doing anything about that?" Tara probed.

"Why should I be the one to fix our marriage when he has yet to fix the reason it's broken in the first place?"

"He's not going to leave the club, Dev."

"I know that. That's not the problem." She laughed humorlessly. "You still don't know." Tara frowned, puzzled. "Of course you don't know. Jax would be stupid to let you find out that Clay and Tig were the ones responsible for my 'accident'." She revealed and Tara's eyes widened. "They thought Opie was a rat so they put a hit on him and almost killed me instead."

"Oh God." Tara muttered in shock. "Jax said Opie killed the guy who did it. Does he know the truth?"

"Yeah. Apparently, my Dad grew a conscience and confessed."

Tara shook her head unbelievably. "How could you come back? Especially for Tig?"

"It's twisted, I know." She shrugged defenselessly. "I hate what he did, things between us will never be the same, but I can't hate him. Believe me I've tried."

**VVVVVVVVVVVV**

The first time Tig tried to contact her after the incident, he actually came to Mesa. Isabel answered the door to find him with a beaten face looking more broken than she had ever seen him. She wanted to comfort him, but he had hurt her baby, taking her cheating husband's side over his own daughter. Devon didn't want to see him and she didn't want him around her either.

Devon could hear her mother yelling at her father all the way in the back of the house. She moved forward so she could hear better what he had to say. Would he actually tell her the truth because it was obvious that her mother thought something very different had gone down.

Devon would never find out because Isabel didn't give him the chance to say anything. She peeked around the hallway corner just in time to see her mother finish her rant with a slap across his face before she shoved him back and slammed the door shut.

He left and didn't come back. Devon didn't hear from him again until the call from Stockton Penitentiary which she declined, as well as the second.

Then the letters started.

The first two she threw away without opening them. When the third came, curiosity got the best of her and she held onto it. It took her a week to actually read it and when she did, she was blown away.

She had never received such an outpouring of emotions from her father. She didn't even know he was capable of such affection and definitely not remorse. And then her mother shared with her the letters she had started getting from him as well. Isabel joked that he must have been body snatch while inside because it was as if a different person had written the letters.

It compelled Devon to respond. Her letters were angry and harsh at first, but he seemed to take every blow in stride and responded humbly and apologetically each time. They continued to write back and forth and eventually she was able to forgive him. More for herself than him.

Tig may have opened up to her emotionally and regretted hurting her, but he was and forever would be a Man of Mayhem, more loyal to the club than anything else. Devon couldn't change that. She would only drive herself mad to no avail if she tried. He had promised to never hurt her again and she believe him. It allowed for her to forgive, but when it came to people she trusted, he was no longer one of them. She loved him because he was her father, that didn't mean she had to like him. He was her family and given the unconventional state of their relationship, more friends than father/daughter, a little more convolution seemed like a natural progression for them.

**VVVVVVVVVVVV**

"It's Clay that I hate. He made the call and didn't have the balls to do it himself so he let my father, of all people, do it." Devon continued, her face twisting in anger and contempt that Tara had never seen in her. "He turned on Opie and he destroyed my family." And the bastard felt no remorse because he had yet to apologize for it. "I _hate_ that man and I wish-" She stopped herself from voicing her true desire – for Clay to die. SAMCRO, Charming, the whole world would be a better place without him in it. It would never come to pass so there was no use putting any hope into that dream. "Never mind, it doesn't matter, it was trumped up as protecting the club. And we all know-"

"If it's to protect the club, then it's ok. Nothing's more important than the club." Tara supplied sorely.

"Yup." Devon smiled with resignation to that truth. Among others. "You do realize neither of us will ever really make a clean break from SAMCRO."

"I know."

Between her children and Devon's father, they were connected forever whether they wanted to or not.

"Not to mention these stupid tattoos. What were we thinking?" Devon said as she looked in the mirror and pulled aside the strap of her tank top to uncover her crow along her left collar bone.

"We weren't, at least not with our heads." Tara quipped.

They both giggled until the reality of their predicament set in. It was more than just Abel, Thomas or Tig that kept them tied to the club. It was their hearts – Jax and Opie. They both were still very much in love with them, they just couldn't be with them anymore.

"Screw it." Devon announced and turned to her friend. "We're moving on." Tara gave her a dubious look. "Well we're going to at least try, damnit."

Tara laughed at her poor attempt at conviction, yet she agreed with her declaration. So that Friday, she took a half a day from work for her makeover and by the time Devon and her staff were finished, Devon proposed.

"Your boys are still with Jax so we are going out tonight to celebrate."

Later that evening, dressed in a double layered low cut tank top, her favorite pair of skinny jeans that hugged her hips perfectly, a pair of knee high boots and her cream colored leather jacket, Tara was ready.

Tonight was the night for a restart. It was past time for her to get back in touch with the girl that wasn't so serious all the time and knew how to have fun. Life was too short to be as uptight as she had become and too short to hold on to something that obviously wasn't meant to be. She had too much going for herself to be miserable – a successful career, two beautiful boys who were healthy and happy. She deserved to be happy too and let her hair down every once and awhile.

When Tara arrived at her house, Devon walked out in a racer back halter top, leather leggings, ankle boots and a gray leather jacket. She locked up and climbed into the passenger seat of the SUV.

"Ready for tonight?" Tara asked with a wicked grin on her face.

Devon looked at her and she could see some of that stress and hurt was starting to melt off her best friend. Stuck in the same place as her, she knew all of it would never be gone, but it was a start.

"You bet your ass I am."

They laughed and Tara pulled out, headed to McCoor's Bar and Pool Hall.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

McCoor's was one of the few places in Charming where you didn't have to worry about getting caught up in a bar brawl or shoot out. Most of the yuppie wannabes in town hung out there, so the Sons and any of the other local crews stayed clear. There wasn't a place in Charming where Tara and Devon could go without being known, but at least at McCoor's they could have a few drinks, play pool, and just be without any aggravations.

They had played a few games already and had more than a few drinks. Tara's car would definitely be staying in the parking lot overnight and they'd be riding home in a cab. That was more than fine for the duo. They were having fun, enjoying a much needed night to unwind.

"So, Marcus's wife was giving you the evil eye the entire time she was in the shop." Tara mentioned as she bent over the pool table to take her next shot.

"Old, bad blood." Devon told her, standing with her chin resting on her hands that were stacked on the tip of her cue stick. "Before she was Marcus's wife, she was a just croweater. And I kicked her skanky ass out of my Dad's place when I caught her there; naked in _my_ bed." Tara gave her a disgusted look. "I know. I don't even want to imagine what she and my father were doing in my room. I wasn't even living there anymore and I scrubbed it down with bleach."

She had also taken her dolls out of storage and rearranged them around the room. She told her father that if he ever brought another slut into her room, she'd junk-punch him so hard he wouldn't be able to use it again.

Stepping away from the table, having scratched her shot, Tara laughed. "Well she's apparently still pissed."

"Like I care." Devon scoffed and was about the take her turn when a new song started playing from the jukebox. "Oh gosh. Remember this?" She looked to her friend, grinning madly. Putting her cue stick down against the table, she sang and danced over to her. "Come on Tara." She cajoled, holding her hand out.

She grabbed on and the two women started dancing around each other in a circle to one of their favorite songs when they were teens. They were having such a good time, they didn't notice that they had an audience.

McCoor's had a decent crowd tonight, mostly locals who knew of the two dancing women and watched them sporadically out of curiosity. There were also a couple of guys in the bar who weren't Charming natives. They had been watching Tara and Devon in an entirely different light since they walked in. They saw a couple of hot chick that had put away a few rounds of shots and were now dancing around enticingly. They looked like they were ready to really party.

The song ended and Tara and Devon returned to their game, smiling and laughing over the shared memories.

"That was one of the best summers." Tara proclaimed nostalgically.

"Mmhmm. We both had our licenses so my Dad's truck was basically ours and we could go wherever we wanted."

"Like when we went camping." Tara reminisced. "Jax and Opie trying to act all macho, setting up the tents and cutting fire wood, but they ended up running and screaming like girls when that _chipmunk_ ran across the camp ground." That started another round of giggles, remembering the moment just as clear as day. "I swear I never laughed so hard in my entire life."

"Excuse us ladies. Can we buy you some drinks?"

They turned to see two strange men strolling up to them. Charming wasn't that big, everyone knew everyone and they did not know these two.

"Um, no thanks. We're good." Tara replied politely.

"Come on, you girls look like you know how to have a good time." One of the guys pushed, grinning flirtatiously and moving a little too close for their liking.

Irritated by their persistence, Devon took the direct approach. "Yeah, not with you."

Tara couldn't help, but laugh at her moxie.

Unfortunately, she was the only one who found Devon's attitude funny.

**VVVVVVVVVVVV**

Mike McCoor tried to keep his place peaceful and drama free so whenever Charming riff raff or any non-locals came in, he always kept an eye on them. Thankfully, he had known John Teller, Piney Winston and other members of the Sons of Anarchy for years and could call on a favor if things ever got hairy. His camaraderie with them kept any underhanded dealings away from his business.

He had spotted the two SAMCRO Old Ladies when they came in. He had known them since they were teenagers. They weren't like most of the women connected with the club. They were respectable, classer and didn't cause any problems unless they had no other choice.

He also saw the two strangers approach them and he could tell when the women were out of options so he picked up his phone and placed a call.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

"Jax, phone." Phil called from behind the bar at the clubhouse.

He stood from his seat at a table with Kozik and Opie. "Yeah….Shit. We'll be right there." He hung up and barked. "Op, we gotta go."

"What's up?"

"Some shit's going down at McCoor's with Tara and Dev." Opie's face brightened knowingly. "Someone's about to get their ass kicked." Jax chuckled.

"Tara and Devon in a chick fight? I gotta see this." Juice said excitedly.

"Nah. They're fighting dudes, man." Jax clarified.

"Even better." Kozik added, moving to tag along like Juice as he started towards the exit behind Jax and Opie.

"Wait a second, I'm coming with you." Tig growled. "A man puts a hand on my kid, I'm breaking his fuckin' neck."

The five men marched outside to mount their bikes and they took off towards town center. McCoor's wasn't too far away, but it was far enough for plenty of damage to be done.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Having been rebuffed and watching the chicks laugh at their expense, the men became enraged. There was no way they were walking away without getting something for their trouble.

Tara and Devon had dismissed them and went back to playing pool. Tara was on deck and posed for her shot when her butt was squeezed. She whirled around to see the men still there. One was further away while his buddy closest to her, the obvious culprit, was grinning triumphantly. She didn't hesitate and slapped him.

"Don't ever put your hands on me again." She warned, pointing her finger in his face. "Now get the hell away from us."

There was nothing more to be said; no explanation or apology necessary. So Tara turned back to the game expecting them to just leave and the whole ordeal to be over.

"You little cockteasing bitch!" He lunged at her, catching her off guard and he grabbed her from behind.

"Hey!"Devon yelled and dropped her cue on the table to go to Tara's rescue. Unfortunately the guy's partner charged at her and held her hostage. "Let go of me you piece of shit!"

Thankfully, Tara didn't need her help. She wiggled enough in his grasp to be able to elbow him. He let her go, clutching his sore stomach and she took full advantaged. She kneed him in the balls and when he was bent in half, she kicked him in his face.

"Ah!" He let go of his crotch to cup his nose that was leaking blood, and fell over onto a nearby table.

Patrons had scattered to the safer side of the bar, abandoning their food and drinks.

Pissed off, Tara didn't let him get off that easily, especially when he blindly took a swipe at her. She picked up a beer bottle and hit him over the head. Anger and alcohol allowed him to maintain consciousness and he tried to fight back. This time, she grabbed a plate of half eaten chicken wings and slammed it into his head. It shattered with the force of the hit and he finally fell to the ground.

Meanwhile, Devon had rescued herself as well. When the guy snagged her wrist to stop her, she turned around and decked him. He released her and picking up her cue stick like a bat, she swung away, breaking it across his chest. He cried out and fell over the side of the pool table. She used Tara's stick and swung again, this time catching him across his back. He arched back, crying out once more and stumbled to the ground. She didn't stop her attack and straddled his body to wail at him over and over.

And that was the scene that the guys walked in on – Tara and Devon causing mayhem, screaming and cursing, tearing the bar and the two men apart.

"Holy shit." Juice exclaimed, fully entertained.

Jax and Opie quickly rushed forward into the fray.

Tara's back was to Jax so he was able to wrap her up in his arms to get her under control. Unfortunately, she thought it was another attacker and started thrashing about, scratching at his hands.

"Ow! Damnit, Tara. It's me."

She immediately stopped at his familiar voice. "Jax?"Coming to realize what was happening and seeing the man who touched her writhing and groaning in pain on the floor, she went ballistic again. "You asshole!" She kicked at him and Jax lifted her up, putting her out of reach. "Jax, let me go!"

"I don't think so darlin'. Kozik, get over here." He hollered and ordered. "Take her outside."

Kozik took her from him and hauled her out of the bar.

Opie was taming a similar wild one.

He had come up on Devon and caught her wrist mid swing. "That's enough." He told her and pulled her up from the ground.

She growled at him and tried the pry his fingers off of her, but with no luck. Opie called Juice for help and he led her outside behind Tara.

As the remaining three Sons stood over the pathetic lumps on the ground, Jax told Tig. "Get the back door."

He and Opie dragged the beaten men out into the alley to take turns delivering their own message – Don't Touch Our Women.

Leaving them there, they trekked back through the bar. Jax gave Mike his thanks for calling and handed him a few bills for his trouble.

Out front in the parking lot, Juice and Kozik sat at their bikes playing guard dogs. Despite probably being able to take them on, the ladies had settled down. Devon was laid out on the hood of Tara's car while she sat on the front bumper cradling her face in her hand.

"Nice job in there, baby girl." Tig praised as he and the other ambled over.

"Thanks Dad." She beamed.

"You guys okay?" Opie asked, leaning against the car where her legs dangled over the side.

"Oh just peachy." Tara growled from under her hair making Devon burst out laughing. "It's not funny!" Slapping that guy was justifiable. The rest of it was her letting her emotions get the best of her and she unleashed all her current frustrations out of him. It wasn't fair.

"Yeah it is." Devon slid off the car and staggered until she was bent over in front of her. Grabbing the sides of her face, she tilted her head up. "Hurricane Tara is _finally_ back. I love it! Mwah." She laid a big smacking kiss on her forehead.

Both laughing, Tara batted her away and Devon bouncing out of her reach, dancing to the music coming from inside. Her feet got tangled up and Opie was quickly to hook her around the waist keeping her from falling in her drunken state.

Jax was standing next to Tara watching her amusingly. "We need to take you guys home."

Outraged, she stood up unsteadily and got in his face. "Why do we have to go home? We didn't do anything! I told him not to touch me. It's not my fault he got his ass kicked by a chick." She could barely contain her laughter.

"You're going home." He told her, trying not the chuckle at how cute she was drunk.

"Fine." He reached out to anchor her when she stumbled slightly and she slapped his hands. "I can walk by myself thank you." She spoke haughtily. "And don't you dare tell anyone about this."

"Well I'm not going home." Devon protested.

"Yeah you are." Before she could argue any further, Opie bent down to throw her over his shoulder and headed for his bike.

"Hey!" She screeched.

"Shut up." He responded, ignoring the weak slap to his back.

Tig, Kozik and Juice were laughing uncontrollably as they watched Jax and Opie try the wrangle Tara and Devon. They may have missed out on a good fight, but it was still a damn good show.

"Juice, go back to the club and have the prospects come back for her car." Jax told him and guided a more subdued Tara to his ride.

The group split up. The three solo riders made it back to the clubhouse without any hassle and a kick ass story to tell. Jax and Opie still had a struggle on their hands, getting the willful women in their respective homes.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

"I got it!" Tara yelled, shoving Jax's hand away as he tried to help her get her key into the lock. Finally, she successfully opened the door and as she stepped over the threshold, she felt him following. Rounding on him, she put a halting hand on his chest. "You can go home now."

Sighing heavily, he propped his hands on the doorframe, caging her in. "Tara." He spoke softly, the plea clear in his tone.

He wanted back in; back in her home, her bed and her heart.

Tara had to look away from those piercing blue eyes that she loved so much. They were filled with the same longing she felt and with her inhibitions as low as they were right now, she was tempted to give in.

Her hair fell over her eyes when she turned her head and they both reached out to tuck it behind her ear. Their hands touch and that spark between them flared to life. Jax tried to hold on to it by keeping her fingers trapped in his, but she managed to break free.

"Tara." He called to her again, feeling her shutting him out. He tried to move further into the house and she pushed him back out onto the porch.

"Go home Jax." She begged, and closed the door before she broke down and let him in.

Feeling rejected once again, Jax mashed his forehead into the door harshly, grunting his frustration. He stayed there for a moment until he shook off the disappointment and left.

Directly on the other side, Tara sagged against the door when she finally heard him leave. If he had stayed a second longer, she was sure she would have lost the fight to resist him.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Having carried her from his bike, not because she couldn't walk, but because she didn't want to, Opie deposited Devon on her bed. "Alright, get some sleep or you're gonna be feeling it tomorrow." He suggested.

"What? You're leaving?" She cried out when she looked up to see him walking away. "You can't leave." She huffed, raising herself up on her elbows.

"Dev."

"Come on." She got up on her knees and crawled to the end of the bed. He was still close enough for her to grasp his open cut and pull him to her. "Look where we are." She purred. Her eyes droopy with lust. "Remember the things we used to do in this room?" He swallowed thickly as she began to run her hands up his chest and around his neck. "You're still the only man I've ever been with Op." She confessed in a murmur against his cheek followed by a light kiss.

Her head dripped low to meet her lips with his neck and she began to lay open mouth kisses on his skin.

"Devon. Come on." Opie fought weakly even as his head tilting to give her better access. He let out a deep, pleasurable groan when she hit one of his particularly sensitive spots.

She giggled, but she respected his wishes and backed off. "You really want me to stop?" He said nothing so she shrugged. "Ok then." She moved away from him with her hands up in surrender. Her eyes said otherwise.

Opie just stared at her, torn. She was so damn beautiful and God help him, he still wanted her despite their separation.

Devon decided to make it easy on him.

She reached down and lifted her shirt off, exposing her bare chest. "Goodnight Harry." She said huskily, looking straight at him, a tempting glint in her eyes.

Opie could no longer resist her. With a growl, he grabbed the sides of her face and pulled her into a hard kiss. She melt against him, pulling at his cut, removing it. Parting their lips, they worked together to get his Henley off.

Devon moved her kisses to his newly bare chest and up to his shoulder. She stopped when she noticed that he still had his tattoo of her. Beaming up at him, she ripped the cap off his head, diving her hands into his hair and yanking him down into a heat kiss.

Opie wrapped her in his arms and they fell back on the bed. Frantically, they rid themselves of the rest of their clothes and preceded to make love all throughout the night.

* * *

><p><strong>So there is it – a little taste of the Women of Mayhem. There's no doubt in my mind that Tara used to be a bad bitch back in her days before she became an upstanding surgeon and mother. This was the start of her getting back in touch with that tough, take-no-shit-from-nobody, chick and finding a balance between the two.<strong>

**Question – what do you guys think about the chapter soundtracks? Do you like them, do you not like them, or are there other songs that you think would be a better fit? I'd love to know. You may hip me to some new jams I might need to check out ;)**

**Remember - feedback feeds the muse!**


	7. Chapter 7

**I so did not expect for it to take this long to post the next chapter. Between work and life in general, I could not find the time to sit down and finish this chapter. Sorry for the delay. Do you forgive me? I hope so because I have a nice long chapter for you to enjoy!  
><strong>

**Once again, epic thanks for all the views, fav/follows, reviews and hey – I was added to a community! So cool! You guys are the bomb dot com!**

**Chapter Soundtrack ~ There are two this time since I couldn't choose: **_**Bringin' On the Heartbreak**_** – I love the Def Leppard version, but the Mariah Carey cover fits this chapter more with it coming from a female perspective & **_**Stupid**_**: Sarah McLachlan**

* * *

><p>The sound of his phone ringing became louder and louder as Opie drifted awake. Memories from last night quickly surfaced and he lifted his head to see Devon laying naked under his equally naked body. He groaned and rolled backwards where he had tossed his clothes last night. Retrieving his cell out of his pants pocket, he looked at the display screen.<p>

"Shit." He exclaimed.

"Who is it?" He heard Devon asked in a gravelly voice behind him. He didn't answer and climbed out of the bed to redress.

Devon had heard the phone ringing in the distance, but she ignored it in favor of staying right where she was; warm and cozy with the familiar weight of her husband lying on her chest. Her happy bubble was broken when he chose to get up and acknowledge the call. Unable to go back to sleep, she reluctantly woke up and wrapping the sheet around her chest, she scooted back to rest against the headboard. She rubbed the lingering sleep from her face, thankful for just the slightest bit of a hangover. Looking down at the end of the bed, she saw Opie getting dressed.

"Who was it?" She asked again, assuming it was one of his brothers and wanting to know who she needed to ream out.

Opie finished putting his pants on and he sat back down to put on his boots. "It's Lyla." He finally told her. "I gotta go." After tying his laces, he sat up and let out a regretful breath. "Last night was a mistake. It shouldn't have happened."

Devon scoffed. She couldn't believe he was pulling this. Not only was he running off to his little porn star after they had sex, but he was lying to her. If it was such a mistake, why couldn't he look at her when he said it? He could continue to live in denial if he wanted too, but she wouldn't stay there with him.

"Whatever. Go right ahead and believe that if you want to." Standing up, she walked off of the bed toward her ensuite bathroom. "Make sure you're gone by the time I come out." She sneered with the slam of the door behind her.

Opie clenched his jaws in a silent growl, gripping one fist in his other hand. Things between him and Devon were so out of whack. He didn't know what last night was. All he knew was that it felt damn good and he was pretty sure sleeping with his wife wasn't an actual mistake. Even though, he now had Layla, his fiancée, looking for him. His life was getting way too complicated.

"Fuck." He exclaimed with frustration. Scooping up his cut, he stomped out of Devon's bedroom and the house. He needed to get his head together before he could deal with another confrontation with her or face Lyla. And he knew sooner or later, Devon would come at him, wanting his choice once and for all.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

"Coming." Tara called out to the knocking at her front door. She opened it to find Devon standing there wearing a pair of big sunglasses and her hair in a sloppy bun.

"You look like you're having a better morning than me." She quipped. She had woke up smelling like a bar and with a killer headache. Now after a hot shower and some pain meds, she was feeling normal again.

"Unless you had sex with your estranged husband, I'm sure I feel worse." She walked sluggishly into the house.

Tara winced. "Oh."

"Yea!" Devon could smell fresh brewed coffee so she went into the kitchen to get a cup.

Tara got one for herself and they took a seat at the kitchen table. "So what happened?" She asked.

She stretched out on the table top and dropped her forehead into the palm of her hand. "Grr…..I don't want to talk about it." She whined. "You go first. What happened when Jax brought you home?"

Tara gave her a brief rundown of her confrontation with Jax on the front porch. She admitted that she was so close to letting him in last night. Despite how much she wanted him and missed him, she was glad she hadn't. There was nothing Jax had done or said to her since she moved out that made her believe their relationship would be different if they were to reconcile. She'd be lying if she said she wouldn't go back to him, but not to such a one-sided relationship. She needed to know that they were in this together and that he wouldn't pull the rug out from under her again if things got tough. Until he gave her some proof that their relationship was actually worth something to him, she wasn't budging.

"Jax is a smart man. If he wants me back, he can figure out how to get me back on his own." She decided once and for all. "I can't focus on him anymore. It's time for me to be a little selfish and concentrate on me." She smiled with determination. "Like last night. I had so much fun, even if it did end in a bar fight."

Devon grinned. "Yeah you seem more relaxed than I've seen you in a long time."

"For the first time since I moved to Chicago, I felt like myself again." She admitted. "I've just been going through the motions. Its only when it comes to the boys that I really know who I am or where I belong."

She had felt so lost for so long. Sure she made it through med school and had a great career, but there was no real purpose or joy in her life. She found that when she came back to Charming and fell in love with a precious baby boy in St. Thomas's NICU. She thought she had recaptured it with his father as well.

"When I was with Jax, there were only fleeting moments. Our connection's not what it used to be. We don't fit like we used. I'm not sure if we ever did."

"That is not true at all." Devon refuted immediately. "You and Jax were like addicted to each other and neither of you give a shit what anyone thought about it."

There were a few people in particular who didn't approve of how intense Jax and Tara's relationship was – Gemma, Clay and when he was sober, Tara's dad. It made no difference to the young couple and when they had to, they fought any and every opposition to their relationship. It got to a point where their parents stop trying. Together and separately, Jax and Tara were forces to be reckoned with.

"You didn't even care what anyone thought about _you_ back then." Devon commented pointedly.

Tara sighed at the look she had aimed at her; knowing her best friend was wondering where that Tara had gone. "I know."

There was a time in her life when she wasn't afraid of anything, including being who she was. That's why it was so easy for her to be a loner growing up. When people turned their noses up at the town drunk's daughter, she thought, _fuck them_. When her classmates at UCSD called her a stuck up bitch and avoided her, she thought, _fuck them too_. Somewhere along the way, she had lost track of the girl who didn't need others' acceptance. Last night, she let go of those insecurities that were holding her back and she felt free. She wasn't going back into that cage.

"I think I found her again though."

"Good because I very much enjoyed having my best friend back." Devon perked up in her chair. "I need her to stand by me once again and remind the good people of Charming that we're not going to take any of their bullshit." She declared. "Abel and Thomas are going to grow up to be happy, at least half way normal little boys." They laughed at the truth of the exception. "And I'm going to get my divorce." She tried to smile, but it began to tremble until it fell and was replaced with tears.

She wanted to believe that there was still a chance for her and Opie. This morning had striped away some of her unwavering hope. After the night that they shared, she was sure he'd still be sitting on her bed when she came out of the bathroom. He hadn't stayed and she felt so hurt, so rejected. She had never felt that way, not because of him. The chance that they wouldn't reunite became very real at that moment.

"Hey, hey. You okay?" Tara reached out to rub her arm soothingly.

"He's marrying someone else, Tara." She cried. "This wasn't supposed to happen. I was supposed to spend the rest of my life Opie." Since she was a teenager, there had been no question that she was going to grow old and die with him at her side. She couldn't imagine life without him. "It'll never be okay again."

Tara pulled her friend close and let her breakdown in her arms.

Both women were in a hopeless situation. Sure they'd adapt and survive, but they would never be whole again. There was no way to really get over the love of your life.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Weeks went by, the end of October had arrived and Devon was coming up on her third month back in Charming. Admittedly, she had expected to be here for the long run because she just knew that seeing her in the flesh would make Opie realize how much he wanted her and force his hand for a reconciliation. That obviously wasn't going to happen and now she was stuck in Charming until he decided to start the divorce proceedings.

She had seen Opie plenty of times, but he avoided her and she hadn't heard anything from the club's lawyer, Lowen. As long as he continued to put off some sort of resolution to their marriage, so would she. It may been childish and obstinate, but she refused to be the one to wave the white flag.

Tara was having an easier time at handling her screwed up love life. It helped that she had the boys to concentrate on to distract her from missing Jax. With Halloween approaching, she was extra busy with them; decorating the house, pick out a pumpkin at the pumpkin patch outside of town, craving it up for display on the porch and finally, picking out costumes for trick or treating.

Abel was currently obsessed with The Avengers, specifically Iron Man, so he had already decided on his costume. Thomas was still too young to know what Halloween was about, but Tara still wanted him to be able to take part with his brother. She let Abel make the choice for him and of course his little brother had to be an Avenger too. The Hulk to be exact.

Devon had joined her and the boys to go shopping for the costumes and while they were out, she invited herself to go trick or treating with them. She also came up with the bright idea for her and Tara to dress up with the boys. Tara figured "why not" and let her handled the details in regards to their costumes.

Earlier that month, Tara had to pick up the boys from the clubhouse when something came up with the club and Jax couldn't keep them for the night. Gemma had them with her as they waited for her to arrive and when she did, she mentioned that Abel had told her that she was taking them trick or treating. Tara was expecting Gemma to start preach about her turning the boys into "pussies" by letting them dress up for the occasion. Surprisingly enough, Gemma asked her to come by the house on Halloween so she could see their costumes and be the first one to put candy in their pumpkins.

The night of, Devon met up with them at Gemma's so they could start on her block and work their way around the neighborhood. When they arrived, they found the guys' bikes along with other cars parked outside. Apparently, Gemma was having a get together.

"Oh great." Devon lamented. She spotted Opie's bike among the bunch and she was in no mood to be around him.

Tara moved to get Thomas out of his car seat while Devon did the same with Abel. "Yeah, let's make this quick." She suggested, just as irritated by what was most likely a trap. She couldn't imagine what Gemma's angle was here. She wasn't about to let her scare her off though. "Baby, you go ahead inside." She told Abel who was standing by anxiously.

He raced ahead while she and Devon followed at a more subdued pace.

"Knock, knock." Devon said as they walked into the house.

They were greeted by Piney, Bobby, Chibs, Kozik, Juice, the Prospects, Opie and Jax scattered around the living room. With a view into the kitchen, they could see some of the club women moving about, preparing dinner.

"See Daddy, Tommy is The Hulk." Abel exclaimed from across the room where Jax was sitting on the couch with Opie. "Go rah Tommy."

Thomas scrunched up his face and grunted, making his parents laugh.

"It's about time you got here." Gemma said to the two women, walking in from the kitchen and over to take her grandson from his mother. "What the hell are you wearing?" She asked what everyone else was thinking.

Tara was dressed in a white bohemian maxi dress with her jean jacket, but she had on a pair of white wings and a gold halo headband, depicting her role as an angel. Devon was the exact opposite - a devil wearing a black babydoll dress, black wings, a horned headband and a pointed tail.

"They're called costumes." Devon replied mockingly and Tara chuckled softly.

"Smartass." Gemma moved over to the couch to hand Jax his son and perched next to him on the armrest.

"_Why _are you two dressed up?" Opie broached, trying to ignore how good Devon looked in the short dress and fishnet stockings.

Ever since their night together, he couldn't get her out of his head. He tried to stay away from her and concentrate on Lyla. It had yet to work and seeing her right now sure as hell wasn't helping.

"I don't know, maybe to have a little fun. God forbid someone have some fun around here." Devon mouthed and walked over to sit on the arm of father-in-law's chair, kicking at Juice when he tugged at her tail in passing. "What are you all doing here? It's Halloween. Shouldn't you be out terrorizing the town folk?" She quipped and squealed when Bobby reached over, pinching at her side.

"We're just waiting on Clay and Tig before we head out." Opie answered her, hoping for something better after receiving that snarky reply from her. Unfortunately, she said nothing and went about barely acknowledging his presence.

"Then they're coming back for dinner. You girls should join us." Gemma offered.

"Maybe. If the boys aren't too tired." Tara reminded her.

Gemma just smiled at her tightly, choosing not to argue with her. She had actually been doing well at not picking fights with Tara. Not only did Jax's warning ring in the back of her head whenever she was tempted, but Tara was sticking to her word. Jax saw the boys often and they still spent time at the clubhouse with the rest of the family. She had no justifiable cause to fight with her so for now there was peace between her and Tara.

"So Doc, Dev - The angel and the devil. I don't know if I want to go to heaven or hell." Kozik teased, wiggling his eyebrows at them salaciously.

Tara had remained close to the front of the room, leaning against the wall beside the chair Chibs was sitting in. She snorted. "You are not getting into heaven."

"And hell doesn't want you." Devon added on, making everyone guffaw and rag on him.

"I think you two put together the perfect outfits." Gemma implied teasing Devon in particular.

"Hey I could be an angel if I wanted to. Don't let Tara fool you." She smirked at her friend. "I mean, let's not forget who has a rap sheet and who doesn't."

"That's because I don't flash my breasts to get out of trouble." Tara shot back.

Bitch." Devon outraged even as she laughed. "I did that once and you're the reason I had to flash that cop anyway."

"Was it assault and battery? I hear that's ye girls favorite." Chibs jabbed at their recent bar brawl. He chuckled when Tara playfully smacked him in the shoulder.

"It was self-defense." She refuted both his and Devon's allegations.

"Everytime?" Opie stated drily, humoring the room.

Jax and Devon shared a look as they laughed knowingly. There was a time or two where the three of them had witness first hand Tara "defending" herself when they were younger.

"Ass." She threw at Opie and he grinned.

Just then, the front door opened and Layla walked in with a couple of grocery bags in her hands.

"Hi everybody." She smiled until she noticed Devon sitting next to Piney. As her face dropped, the room became awkward and silent.

"Hey baby." Gemma greeted her and got up to amble over to her. "Thanks for picking up this stuff for me." She kissed her cheek and took the bags from her.

"There's more in my car."

Gemma turned to her fiancé before heading towards the kitchen. "Help her get the rest of the bags Op."

He stood, glancing at Devon. She wasn't even paying attention, purposely ignoring them in favor of chatting with Bobby and Piney.

As he and Lyla went outside, Tara felt it was the perfect time to make an exit.

"Hey guys, I think it's time we get started and go get some candy." She announced enthusiastically.

Abel cheered and ran over to her side. Jax joined them with Thomas in his arms and Tara said goodbye as they walked out.

Devon rose from her seat, bid the men farewell and followed them outside. Thankfully, Lyla had just come back into the house so she was able to avoid an uncomfortable run-in. However, she wasn't able to avoid Opie.

"Excuse me." She said since he was blocking her path to the driveway where Jax was taking the boys' stroller out of the back of Tara's SUV.

"Dev, wait a minute." He tried as he sat the case of beer he'd been carrying on the ground.

"When am I going to be served those divorce papers Opie?" She abruptly cut off whatever he was planning to say. "I mean what's with the delay? It's not like we got a bunch of shit that need to be divided up."

Burned by her callous attitude, he sneered. "Lowen's working on them."

"Right." For a moment, she looked at him so dejectedly that it softened his anger towards her.

Trying to salvage this conversation, he complimented her. "Nice costume." One corner of his lips curled up and his eyes drifted down her body, lingering in places.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever." His hand reached up and brushed a fallen feather off her shoulder. "Don't touch." She warned.

With an all-out grin, he stepped closer and murmured gruffly. "You didn't mind not too long ago."

"Maybe not, but we both know your fiancée would." Moving even closer to him so there was barely any space between them, she advised. "You better get in there before she thinks something's going on."

Apparently, Opie wasn't falling for her dismissal this time because he didn't scowl or growl or turn away from her. He stood there as if he was throwing down the gauntlet and it just pissed Devon off. She was over the back and forth with him.

"You want the divorce so you can live happily ever after with her so just file the damn papers already." She snarled and shoved him out of her way. She felt him try to grab her arm and he called after her, but she refused to give him any more of her time.

Meanwhile, once Thomas was tucked into his stroller, the boys were all set for their trick or treating adventure.

"Where are you guys gonna be just in case something comes up?" Jax asked.

"Why is there something going on?" She responded skeptically and he quickly assured her that everything was fine with business. "Would you tell me if there was?"

"Yes." He spoke definitively.

She looked at him for a minute, trying to gauge whether or not he was being truthfully. When she saw no trace of a lie, she told him. "We're going to walk this block and the next one over. I'm sure we're going to be fine." She said. "I mean I know I'm dressing like a defenseless damsel, but my Beretta in my bag says otherwise." She grinned and he chuckled.

Tara was definitely in rare form tonight. As a matter of fact, she seemed to be like this a lot lately – almost carefree, yet she wouldn't hesitate to put her foot down when she felt the need. She didn't seem stressed out or worried like she used to be. She was downright playful at times and genuinely happy. It reminded him of the girl he had fell in love with over ten years ago. Like it was back then, whenever she was around, he found it hard to keep his focus off her for too long.

"You know if you're so worried, you could always come with us." She hinted.

"I wish, but-"

"I know." She stopped him. It was disappointing, but she wasn't bitter about it. She knew the deal. "Why don't you have one of the prospects bodyguard us? That considered grunt work right?" She joked.

"Get Philly, we like Philly." Devon said as she joined them.

"Yeah because he does whatever you tell him to do." Jax volleyed.

"Exactly. If only the rest of you would get with the program Teller." She teased, smushing his cheeks playfully.

"Maybe I should send Ratboy instead." He countered with a shiteater's grin on his face. Tara laughed knowingly at the look of mercy on Devon's face.

The prospect had a crazy crush on her, one that reduced him to either stuttering and stumbling over himself or staring at her. It was cute and endearing, but it was still annoying. Devon could only stand it in doses before she was popping the guy in the back of his head and telling him to snap out of it. Two blocks of Ratboy would not go well.

"I'll send Phil, if you talk to Op." Jax bargained, his tone turned serious. He knew all about what his brother was going through with his wife. They needed to hash it out.

Devon pointed at him. "Don't get involved Jax unless you're ready to go there." She was being very pleasant, but she was dead serious and knowing what she was referring to, Jax backed off.

No one was ready to go down that path.

Once he went back inside to send Phil out with them, they started with the procession of houses.

Abel was having a blast getting candy and kudos on his and his brother's costumes. The adults were making the best of it; munching on treats that some people were handing out to the parents. Devon was keeping Tara and Phil entertained with the gossip from work about some of the households they visited. Besides the boys, Tara was having the most fun, watching them laugh and have a good time.

They were just leaving the third house on the second leg of the trip when Jax pulled up next to them in Gemma's Escalade.

"What are you doing here?" Tara spoke, shocked to see him.

"Clay cancelled the meeting last minute." He explained and she could tell that he was not happy about the inconvenience. "I figured I'd catch up with you."

"Oh. Okay." She smiled, happy that he was here. "Thanks for showing up."

It would take more than a last minute appearance for Jax and Tara to find their way back to each other, but Devon could see that they were having a moment. It was best to keep it going especially for the boys so she decided to give them some private family time. Trading place with Jax, and ordering Phil into the passenger seat, she said, "you guys have fun," and drove away, heading back to the house.

Jax snorted humorously and as he and Tara were briefly watching her take off, he felt a small hand slip into his.

"Come on Daddy." Abel said, looking up at him in full Iron Man regalia.

He laughed. "Alright buddy."

Letting his son guide the way, both parents fell in line, continuing down the street.

Now that their father was with them, the boys seemed to be having even more fun. Abel chased Jax around Tara and Thomas, behind bushes and trees trying to blast him. Thomas babbled and squealed happily when Jax took him out of the stroller to carry him, tossing him up in the air occasionally. Tara was having a better time with Jax there too, especially when he started reminiscing on their shared Halloweens when they were teens.

"Being lookout while you and Opie TPed David Hale's house was one thing." She pointed out. "Lighting bags of dog crap on fire on Unser's porch was disgusting. I was not getting involved with any part of that."

Jax snickered. "You missed a good one."

"I'm sure I didn't."

"Mama." Abel dragged out forlornly as he trudged back to his parents on the house's walkway. "It's all filled up." With a pout, he stuck his jack-o-lantern out to show her.

"Aw, I'm sorry baby, but there's only one more house left and their lights are off." She had explained to him earlier what that meant when he tried to walk up to another house that wasn't passing out candy. "I think it's time for us to go back to Grandma's house anyway."

"Aw man."

"There's always next year, bud." Jax assured with a ruffle of his hair.

"You want to ride for the trip back?" His mother asked and he nodded. Tara took his bucket to store in the carrier on the back of the stroller and he climbed into his seat behind Thomas. "We'll go home, have dinner and after I check your candy, you can have two pieces before bed. Okay?" His smile reappeared and he nodded excitedly. "Alright, let's go."

"Hold on." Jax stopped her. "You're not coming back to Gemma's?" She began to protest and he interrupted. "Come on, it's still early, you won't have to worry about dinner." He coaxed. She was still hesitant so he used the ultimate against her. "You want to hang out at Grandma's house, don't you?"

"Yeah!" Abel cheered and copying his brother to best of his ability, Thomas babbled happily.

"See Mom, the kids want to stay at Grandma's."

Tara shifted her glare aimed at him to a reluctant smile as she looked down at her son's pleading face. She could never say no to that face so she relented. "Fine."

"Good." Jax smiled widely ad nudged her over to take control of the stroller. Rumbling like a motorcycle, he took off in a sprint breaking the boys out into a fit of giggles.

Tara smiled watching the three of them goofing off together. She could tolerate being around Gemma for an evening if it meant her boys could continue to have a night like this with their father.

**VVVVVVV**

They got back to the house to see even more people had arrived. Jax brought Abel to hang with him and the guys in the living room while Tara took Thomas to the bathroom for a change. She came back out, settling Thomas in his swing that Gemma had set up in the living room. She saw that Jax had thankfully put on some cartoons for Abel to watch as opposed to listening to whatever crap he and his brothers were talking about. She went into the kitchen to dispose of the dirty diaper in the trash out back. She said hi to everyone in the room and when she came back in, Gemma asked if she was staying. She told her she was and just smiled pleasantly when she said how happy she was to have her join them.

Devon was in the kitchen, chatting with the few she could stand. When she saw Tara, she ditched them and hooked arms with her to pull her into the dining room.

"Thank God you're back and you're staying too." Tara lifted an eyebrow questioningly. "She's been look at me like she wants to kick my ass and whispering with her little friend over there." Devon explained and they both looked over to where Lyla was talking with another croweater. "I'll be damned it I let her run me out of here."

"Well considering you screwed her fiancée, can you blame her?" Tara quipped, trying to get a rise out of her.

"Hey! He's my husband. I can do whatever the hell I want with him." She snapped. "Technically I should be kicking her ass."

Tara was giggling and Devon joined in dragging her into the living room since the guys were much more enjoyable to be around. They walked in to see Abel's candy spread out on the coffee table in from of him. Most of the men were calling out candy names and tossing them to each other.

"What the hell are you doing? You're eating all his candy?" Tara asked incredulously.

Mouth filled with a Snickers, Bobby said in defense. "We're just checking it for poison and drugs and needles and shit."

Everyone started snorting at his lame excuse, trying not to set the Doc off if she really was pissed.

"Right you were." Tara retorted. "Abel, put your candy back into your pumpkin. The rest of you – if you're going to steal candy from a baby, steal it from the one who's asleep and can't eat it anyway." She pointed to Thomas who was dozing in the swing.

Soon Gemma announced that the food was ready and they all convened in the dining room. With everyone together, dinner was loud and lively. All drama was put on hold for the time being and they managed to enjoy each other's' company for the rest of the night.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Days later, Devon arrived at TM looking for Opie. Yesterday, she had received some news and though she was scared shitless, she had to tell him. She didn't see him in the garage so she headed for the clubhouse.

"Thank God you're here." Gemma said when she saw her.

"Why? What's wrong?"

"Op's here. It looks like him and Lyla are done." She revealed. "He needs you." Devon sighed in amazement. This was crazy. The timing couldn't be more ironic. "He's in his room. You should go talk to him."

"Right." She responded perceptively. "You seem awfully happy. I thought you liked Lyla?"

"I do, but you know I'm all about family sticking together baby."

"Hmm." Devon rolled her eyes and with a huff, she yielded to her scrutiny. "Okay." She kissed Gemma on her grinning cheek in passing and headed back to the dorms.

"Come in." She heard from behind the closed door when she knocked.

The door creaked open and Opie turned from unpacking his duffel to see Devon walk in.

"Hey." She said, stepping inside and leaning back against the closed door.

"What do you want?" He asked as he finished unpacking.

"I came by to talk to you, and Gemma told me about you and Lyla. I'm sorry."

He snorted, "yeah," and dropped down on the edge of the bed.

"What happened?" She asked, moving to sit beside him.

"You don't want to know."

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't."

He gave in and told her the gist of it. "We were trying to have a kid and I found out she never stop her birth control." He shook his head sadly. "She said she's not ready to have kids."

Devon missed most of what he said. She was too busy trying to breathe again after the blow of his confession.

"You were trying to have a kid with her? Are you fucking kidding me?!" She outraged once the shock wore off.

"I told you, you didn't want to know."

"I don't even know what to say to you now. I was all set to comfort you and call her every name in the book." She fumed. "Now all I want to do is punch you in the face."

"It was a stupid decision. I thought if we had a kid, she would get out of the business." He clarified. "I'm starting to think she doesn't want out."

"Oh I'm so sorry for you." She replied sarcastically and full of venom.

He barked. "You got no right to be pissed at me. You left me Devon. What the hell was I supposed to do? Wait for you to come back?"

"I shouldn't have had to leave!" She yelled, all the anger from the past resurfacing. "You were supposed to defend me when you found out what happened, not start up a whole new life with some porn slut!"

"I killed that bitch Stahl for you!"

"She's not the one who did it! Clay is!" That bitch of an ATF agent was just an accessory as far as Devon was concerned. She was happy she was gone, but she wasn't the one she blamed. "And now I see you with him acting like he's your best damn pal."

"Clay was just doing what he had to do to protect the club." He said using the same old excuse for anything the club did that was fucked up. "It had nothing to do with you."

Devon slapped him. "It had everything to do with me! _I'm_ the one who almost died. _I'm_ the one who would have had to bury you and mourn you if he had gotten what he wanted." Still to this day, it wasn't thought of her death that hurt the most, it was the thought of losing Opie forever. "Do you have any idea what that would have done to me? That would have killed me." She was in tears at this point and he pulled her into his arms.

"It's over now. You're all the way in Arizona, safe and sound."

She pushed away from him. "You think just because I left that I don't think about you, worry about you? You think I don't care about you anymore? You think I just stopped?" She looked up at him and finally told him the truth. "I still love you, Opie. I always have, I always will."

Confused and torn, he scrubbed his face, pulling his fingers through his hair. He had dreamed of her telling him she loved him again. He still loved her more than he had ever loved anyone. Lyla was mistake and now that they were over, he could easily go back to the woman he really wanted. But he didn't know how they could get past how they had hurt each other.

"You left me. How am I supposed to forgive that?"

"I forgive you." She told him. "I betrayed you when I left and you betrayed me when you let Clay get away with almost killing me. We are even." She stressed.

They stared at each other, Devon begging him with her eyes to end this. She did not want to be apart from him anymore and she could see that he didn't either. Now was the time for them to make it right. They belonged together.

Suddenly Opie grabbed her, dragged her into a hard kiss. She was completely caught off guard, but she quickly recovered and grabbed him just as fiercely, plunging her fingers into his hair, pulling him as close as possible.

He picked her up and right as she was going to wrap her legs around his waist, he tossed her back on the bed. She laughed until she took note of the hungry look in his eyes as he followed her down and started ripping off her clothes. Not one to be passive, Devon did the same with him.

Once they were both naked, he stretched out between her legs and sliding inside of her. Devon moaned and arch her head back, but he clutched the sides of her face, forcing her to lock eyes with him.

"I love you, Dev."

So overcome with happiness a tear rolled down the side of her face and she smiled. "I love you too." Wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him deeply.

They made love and fell asleep wrapped up in each other's arms, feeling like their missing piece was finally back in its rightful place.

* * *

><p><strong>So there it is! What do you all think? I have mixed feeling about this chapter. I'm not sure if I got the whole mood of the moment right, especially with Devon and Opie finally hashing it out. The rest of it I love. It was kind of homage to the family dinner at Gemma's in Season 1 and the SAMCRO breakfast in Season 3. I like when SoA was like that, when they were more like a family. A crazy one, but a family none the less LoL.<strong>

**I gotta say, this is kind of the calm before the storm. Some things are about to go down and it going to come to a head for everyone after this…..**

**I can't promise you anything, but I'm going to try my damnedest not to take so long with the next chapter :) **** Thanks for sticking with me!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:**** I own zilch of SoA. All belongs to KS.**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the views, fav/follows and reviews! You guys are all that and a bag of chips!**

**Now, get ready to welcome a familiar face and SoA subplot – with a twist of course ;) **

**Chapter Soundtrack - Litost: X Ambassadors (**_**Love**_** X Ambassadors; if you've never heard of them, check out their albums)**

* * *

><p>"Hey." Opie murmured against Devon's cheek, kissing her softly. "Wake up baby."<p>

Purring, she rolled over onto her back to see him standing over her fully clothed. "Mmm. Hi." She smiled.

"I gotta go. We have church."

"What time is it?"

"It's almost 9."

"Shit. I have an appointment in a half hour." She sprung up out of bed and over to the closet where Gemma and the girl stored clean linen in each guys' room. "I'm using your shower." She said and disappeared into the ensuite.

With a chuckle, Opie jarred himself from staring at her naked body hopping around his room, slipped on his cut and prepared to leave. "I'll see you later then?" He shouted when the shower began to run. "Maybe we could talk."

Her head popped out of the doorway. "Okay." She smiled brightly and told him goodbye.

Finishing her shower and getting dressed, Devon headed out, passing through the empty main room. She was walking towards the door when she heard the voices coming from the chapel. Seeing as she no longer had the inside track on SAMCRO's dealings, her curiosity was piqued.

She inched her way over and pressed her ear against the closed door. What she heard scared the shit out of her.

Growing up surrounded by outlaws and criminals, Devon knew enough to know how the business worked and she knew that running guns for the IRA was one thing. Running anything for a drug cartel was a different kind of monster. She couldn't believe the Sons were stupid enough to get involved with one. This hook up could potentially end in disaster for SAMCRO and everyone connected to them, including herself.

She wanted to burst into the room and find out what the hell they were doing. But it would do her no good. She would get crucified for "forgetting her place" and she wouldn't get the answers she demanded.

The fact still remind, they were risking too much, putting them all in the crossfire, now more than ever. She wasn't about to stand by idly and do nothing about it. There was only one thing she could think to do so she made a b-line for the exit.

She hurried to her car, digging out her cell and placing a call. The line rang and as she was back out, the receiver pick up.

"Hello." The deep, accented voice spoke.

"Uncle? I think I need your help."

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

"Hey baby." Gemma spoke up from behind the bar when she saw Devon walking into the clubhouse.

The room's attention turned to her, ready to greet her as well until they took note of the unknown man who stood behind her. Their alarms quickly went up.

"Hey everybody." She smiled weakly, nervousness in her voice and her arms crossed in front of her protectively.

Opie approached her. "What's going on? Where the hell were you yesterday?"

Business with the club had held him up from seeing her again after he left her in his dorm room. Early the next day, he got a text from her saying she was too tied up with work – back to back appointments and a trip over to Stockton for supplies. He found it a little odd that she was going all the way to Stockton when he thought she usually had supplies delivered. He didn't dwell on it, what the hell did he know about hair products anyway.

That was until this morning after he went to her house to find her gone and having no lucky at her shop as well. Come to find out, she had her schedule cleared since yesterday and Maritza knew nothing about a supply run to Stockton. He had to meet up with the guys at the clubhouse to discuss last night's business, but he was planning on hunting her down later to find out what was going on with her.

Now here she stood with some man he had never seen before. He was beyond suspicious.

"I was in Stockton like I told you." She answered him. His eyes narrowed in disbelief and she could see the rest to his brothers leering at her guest with extreme caution, bordering on paranoia. Looking back at him, she struggled to find the words to introduce him. "This is um…"

Seeing how the stare down they were receiving was making his niece skittish, the man placed his hands on her shoulders comfortingly and moved to stand in front of her. "I hope we aren't interrupting anything, but I need to have a word with Mr. Morrow." He stated politely.

"How can I help you?" Clay stepped forward in a defensive stance, all of his brothers backing him in the same manner.

"My name is Nero Padilla." He smiled, not at all intimidated and stuck his hand out which Clay shook. "I'm a business man, like yourself," he said knowingly, "and I have a proposition for your club."

Clay glared questionably. "What kind of proposition?"

"One that involves your association with the Galindo cartel."

Keeping a poker face intact, he frowned dismissively. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You don't? Well have you ever heard of the Byz Lats cartel?" Nero posed, playing right along with the act.

"Yeah." They were big time players based out of LA; deep into gambling, dealing, prostitution, and contract killing. A proposal from someone with that kind of money piqued Clay's interest so he probed further. "You one of them?"

"I am them." Nero announced assertively and he smirked. "So I think we both know that you're hooked up with Galindo."

"They're your competition?" Clay asked.

He chuckled. "Not even close." Galindo was a small time cartel. Nothing compared to his organization so he paid no mind when they started making moves in Oakland and Stockton. "That doesn't mean they haven't become a problem for me and since we have a common enemy, I figured why not work together to eliminate the problem."

Initially, the Sons were wary when this mysterious cartel leader introduced himself, but now he was telling them that Galindo was a threat rather than an ally. Something wasn't adding up.

"There's no problem between SAMCRO and Galindo." Jax said, stepping up to stand beside Clay to face off with this guy.

"Not now, but there will be." He spoke candidly. "I mean, once you've made your bank roll with them, you know that Galindo is not going to just let you go - adiós, vaya con Dios." Nero alluded. He shook his head at their ignorance. "No, see first, you're going to finish the job that's you started for them. Then they're going to tied up loose - kill each of you and everyone connected to you – your mothers, sisters, brothers, women, children. Whoever. All gone." He stressed as he outlined the cold hard truth of their deal with Galindo. "That's what brings me here. I can't have let that happen because your family is my family. Isabel is my sister and Devon is my niece." He revealed.

Everyone's eyes shifted over to her, both Tig's and Opie's lingered and looking at them straight on, she nodded. Yes, she and her mother had kept a big secret from them, but Nero's business, personal and professional, was Nero's business. He only allowed information about him to be given on a need to know basis and they just didn't need to know….Until now.

"I don't take threats towards my family lightly. I would assume you all feel the same so I would like to help you remove the threat." Nero concluded.

"And how do I know you're not full of shit?" Clay growled. "You may be trying to eliminate Galindo before they get a chance to make a move on you."

"I don't need help with my business. This isn't about business." His tone turned brusque in his assertion. "This about protecting my family, your family. I thought I could be of assistance. Perhaps I was wrong."

"You are. We don't need help taking care of our own." Clay spoke for them as a whole, all the while disregarding the fact that everyone else wasn't as prepared to reject Nero's offer.

If they were really marked, Charming would turn into a war zone, ending in a blood bath. Yet this information was coming from a stranger, an outsider. How were they to know if his motives were really as he said they were? They needed more solid proof before they could make a decision.

"Very well. Good luck to you gentlemen. You'll need it." Nero glanced at each of them, focusing his stare just a bit longer on Tig and Opie. It was long enough for everyone to see he was especially unhappy with their rejection. "Devon."

She was a daze, completely mortified. Were they really going to dismiss such a blatant threat to them all, to their precious club? And what for, money? She was about to lose it; yell, scream, and rage, but her uncle grabbed hold of her arm and pulling her outside.

"That did not just happen. What am I supposed to do now? What's going to happen now? She asked, almost in a panic.

When she called her uncle and he immediately ordered her to meet him the next day at his office in Stockton, she knew what she overheard was serious. At the same time, she found comfort in the belief that he would be able to fix this. He had the power to do so.

Nero Padilla had lived the criminal lifestyle since he was a teen. By the time he was in his twenties, he was the head of his own crew in Los Angeles; one that was steady growing into a powerhouse. As the years passed, he had created a notorious drug cartel that had domestic and foreign reach. Despite his influence, he kept his business far away from the only family he still had - his beloved baby sister and his niece. He was adamant that they be protected as much as possible from any blow back, whether it be from his enemies or the authority. Staying on the outskirts of their lives was the best way to do that, but that didn't mean he didn't have eyes and ears around as a precaution.

This Galindo hook up had slipped under his radar. Once he got the call from Devon, he sent out some feelers to get the whole story. When he found out what Galindo had in store for the Sons of Anarchy, he had to make sure they knew what the fine print of this deal entailed. If they didn't want his backing, it was up to them what they wanted to do with the information at this point.

Nero stopped once that reached his car and took hold of Devon's shoulders, forcing her to focus on him instead of her fears. "I saw the looks on some of their faces. They're not going to just let it go so I'll give them time to reconsider my offer." He said, slipping his sunglasses on. "If they still don't take it then I want you to go to Los Angeles. I'll send for your mother as well." He looked over the top of her head to see the Sons had followed them out into the lot.

"What about Opie? My dad? My best friend? She has kids with the VP."

"I'm sorry sobrina." There was nothing he could do about those people if they didn't want his help. He cupped the sides of her face and kissed her forehead. "I'll get in contact with you when it's time for you to go."

Dejectedly, Devon watched him get into his car and leave. Her life and her mother's might be saved, but what about the rest of her loved ones? She couldn't just leave them to fend for themselves. This whole revelation was pointless because the club was either too stupid or too proud to accept help. Now she had to go back and face whatever admonishment was waiting for her.

She didn't have to wait very long.

She turned around and Clay was standing right there, looming over her, his face full of so much fury, it terrified her.

"You stupid little bitch." He snarled at her.

Devon may have been a Son's kid and an Old Lady, but she had become a thorn in his side. Each time she pulled one of her disappearing acts, it pulled Opie and his Sergeant at Arms a little bit further away from the club. Her influence was weakening them, making them soft. Even Jax's loyalties were shaky ever since she refused to forget about the failed hit on Opie and remember that protecting the club to priority one. Now she was interfering with business, she had stepped out of place too far this time.

Before Clay could railed at Devon any further, her father shouldered in between them. Opie came forward to pull her away, and both Jax and Gemma joined Tig to hold Clay off.

"Hey, hey. Clay, come on man. Don't talk to my kid like that." He may be his best friend and President, but Devon was his daughter.

"Then get your fuckin' kid in line! She had no business opening up her fuckin' mouth to anyone!" He bellowed. "This is SAMCRO business."

Clay had turned his rage onto Tig and was getting into his face, so Bobby entered into the fray to pull him away from the whole situation. It was getting too heated and if what this Padilla guy said was true, they needed to hold it together, not turn on each other.

Devon breathed a sigh of relief as she watched Clay follow Bobby's coaxing and storm back into the clubhouse. His eyes were filled with so much viciousness towards her, there was no doubt in her mind that he could have killed her where she stood. She was not prepared for that kind of reaction. None of this had turned out how she had imagined.

"Bad move bring an outsider into this sweetheart." Gemma said disapprovingly as she stepped in front of her.

"What was I supposed to do? I had to do something and he's my family. I trust him." She rushed to defend herself.

"We're your family too." She pointed out.

"What family?!" Something inside of Devon snapped and she exploded. "The one that almost put a bullet in the back of my head? It that the fuckin' _family_ you're talking about Gemma?" She stated loud enough for everyone around to hear as she stared at Gemma hard. SAMCRO had become a joke of a family. They probably wouldn't be in this mess, among others, if family still actually meant something to them.

Gemma was stricken by the reminder that Devon, one of their own, the little baby girl who she helped care for herself, had suffered at the hands of their family. Her husband no less, so she backed off and with a sad nod, she followed Clay inside. Bobby joined her, glancing back at Devon with an equally guilty face.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Tig demanded, taking his turn at setting her straight.

"Are you kidding me? How is this _my_ fault? Didn't you hear what he said?" She fired back "He wasn't bullshiting you. You've gotten in bed with the wrong people. They're playing you for a bunch of fools."

"He can't know what Galindo has planned Dev." Jax tried to assuage her with Opie standing next to him. The three of them had formed a semi-circle around her in a show of reining her in. She was not having that and continued to go off.

"You're willing to take that risk?" When they hesitated, trying to figure out how to get her to understand, she got even angrier. "You selfish bastards. It's one thing to risk your lives, but you're willing to risk my life? Mom's? Tara and the boys?" Her questions were rhetorical, she already knew the answer so she didn't bother to give them a chance to respond. "You know what? I don't give a shit what you do." She dismissed her father and Opie, and turned to Jax. "Are you going to tell Tara or will I have? She deserves to know so she can take those boys and get the hell out of here. And I pray to God that Galindo _and you_ never find them." She cursed him and relented to her only real option for survival. "I'm getting out of fucking town once and for all. Good luck staying alive." She turned to leave before she remembered. "Oh and one more thing – congratulations you're going to be a Daddy and a Grandpa. It's too bad you'll never get to enjoy it."

"What?" Tig exclaimed.

Opie gapped, stunned, but he quickly recovered and reached out to stop her.

"Don't touch me." She ripped her arm out of his grasp. "Even if you somehow survive this, I don't ever want to see either of you again." She said to the two most important men in her life. "I'm tired of being second to this club especially when it keeps putting my life in danger." Hurt and anger began to take over her voice as she poured her heart out. "I've stuck by the both of you through so much shit, I came back to this for you and you still can't show me the same kind of loyalty. Why put up with that any longer?" Her breath stuttered as tears began to overcome her. "I'm done."

She conceded for the last time and with a final look of regret, she walked away from them.

"Devon. Devon!" Opie yelled, but it was too late. She got into her car and took off. He moved to get his bike and chase after her, but Jax stopped him.

"Hold on, bro. We gotta figure out what's going on with cartel deal first."

He was right so Opie sent Miles to keep tabs on Devon and make sure she didn't try to skip town.

The three of them headed back into the clubhouse and a full table was called for chapel.

"We need to talk to Alverez. Find out what he knows about this Nero dude." Jax suggested. "He could be telling the truth. Devon wouldn't have brought him here unless something wasn't right."

"Fuck that. He's full of shit." Clay interjected, unwilling to do anything other than forget what Padilla said. He wasn't about to let anyone screw up his deal with Galindo.

"Jax is right. We need to be sure. "Bobby urged him. "I'll make the call, set up a meeting." He offered.

All around the table, nodding heads and muttering of agreement greeted Jax and Bobby's words.

Clay could see that he was the minority so to save face, he went along with their plan. This would all pan out to be about some turf war that had nothing to do with SAMCRO. He'd remind his club how important this deal was, they'd make their money and get out. Galindo and Padilla could fight until they both died, but SAMCRO would be out of it and back to business as usual.

"Until we know what Galindo is really up to, I think we should go on lockdown." Jax spoke up again and once again majority was in agreement with him.

Clay had no choice, but to make the final ruling – a meeting would be set up with Alverez and in the meantime, SAMCRO was going on lockdown. He brought down the gavel and they all dispersed to prepare.

Opie called Miles to tell him about the lockdown and have him bring back Devon. At all cost.

"You tie her up and put her in the back seat of her car if you have to, but I want her back here now."

Jax headed straight for Tara's and thankfully, she was home. He walked into the house, seeing the front room and kitchen empty.

"Tara. Tara." He called out.

"What? What's wrong? Hearing the sense of urgency in his voice, she had hurried out of the boys' room where she was putting them down for a nap.

"Everything's fine." He assured her. "I just need you and the boys to come to and stay at the clubhouse."

"Why?" With trepidation, he explained to her how they had been working with a cartel and now there was suspicion that the arrangement wasn't as sound as they thought. They were going into lockdown just in case. "You have got to be kidding me Jax. Really? _Really_?" She seethed.

"I'm sorry."

Her hand flew up to stop his from giving her one of his excuses and she walked down the hall. When she came back she has suitcases and set them out on the couch.

Jax exhaled heavily. "Thank you." He said, relieved that she wasn't going to fight him on this.

"Don't thank me because we are not going to the clubhouse. We are getting the hell out of Charming." She glared up at him opening each suitcase violently.

"Wait a minute." He grabbed her wrist to stop her when she headed back towards her room to get some clothes.

Shoving him away, she exclaimed. "I _believed_ you!" He had been so convincing when he told her that he was going to change the club. Apparently, it was just another one of his empty promises that she had wasted too much time trusting in. "I can't live on faith anymore Jax." She huffed tiredly and in resignation. "I gotta get us out of here."

"There you go - running again."

"This is not running, this is surviving." She clarified. "You're telling me that a fucking drug cartel might kill me and my children. You think I'm just going to sit around and wait for it to happen?!"

"We don't know for sure that they're a threat."

She gawked at him incredulously. Since when did he need to be sure about protecting their kids? "You do whatever you need to do Jax and I'm going to do what I need to do. I suggest not getting in my way or you will regret it."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

In a blink of an eye, a chilling air took over her whole demeanor and he knew that she would rip him apart with her bare hands, with no remorse, if it meant keeping their boys safe.

"You've just been waiting for this, the perfect chance to take them away." He lashed out at her. He knew it was unfair, but he was losing grip with her.

Pointing at him, she countered fiercely. "You know I have never wanted to take the boys away from you. Now I have no choice. "

"_I_ had no choice! I didn't want to get this deep with the cartel."

"Then why did you let it happen?!" She yelled.

"We needed the deal for protection while we were inside!" He shouted back.

"Well you're not inside anymore so you need to get out of it."

"It's not that simple." He said, deflating under the pressure. "That's why you need to give me time to fix this."

"What if you can't?" She needed more than that from him if she was going to give him a chance. For Abel and Thomas she needed a guaranteed, full proof plan to keep them safe.

"Then I want you to take the boys and leave and never come back." He spoke truthfully, even though the thought alone was painful. He was more convinced than ever that they needed to accept Padilla's offer so it wouldn't come to that. "I just need a chance to make it right. Please."

Looking at him, seeing the desperation in his eyes, Tara decided to keep the faith a little bit longer. "Fine. How long is this lockdown going to take?"

Knowing she wasn't going to take off, he was able to breath easy. "I don't know, but the sooner we get everyone there, the sooner we can concentrate on getting this all worked out." He answered and knowing the drill, Tara said nothing. She simply turned and headed in back to pack up herself and the boys. Jax trailed after her, but standing in front of the boys' door, she stopped.

"You have one week Jax or we're gone." She warned him, pinning him with a fiery gaze. "They don't deserve to live like this."

"I know." He reached out to stroke her cheek and to his relief she didn't push his hand away. "Devon's uncle, Nero, has some connections. He may be able to help us out." Tara was confused by that, but she could wait on an explanation there. "Either way I promise I will fix this."

Until he actually did what he said, there was nothing to say. She put on a brave face and opened the door to wake the boys from their nap. While Jax entertained them, Tara packed up a couple of bags for them and then she left the three to pack some bags for herself.

They arrived at TM to see the clubhouse full and bustling with activity. The guys were getting guns and ammo prepped, Gemma was directing girlfriends and wives to the dorm rooms they would be staying in.

Abel, thankfully oblivious to it all, ran off to play with some of the other kids and Jax took their bags back to his room. Tara spotted Devon sitting at the bar and went to join her.

She looked just as pissed off by this ordeal until Thomas, who had a bit of a crush on his Aunt Devon, saw her and practically jumped out of his mother's arm to get to her.

"Hey buddy." She exclaimed happily and he cuddled into her arms, ready to continue his interrupted nap. "Today has been _such_ a great day wouldn't you agree?" She said to her in pure sarcasm with a big phony smile on her face.

Tara huffed. "I cannot believe this is happening." She dropped down onto the stool beside her. "I'm gone in week if this isn't finished."

"Same here. I'm going to LA to stay with my uncle. Mom too." Devon filled her in. She had called Nero and let her know that he was right; the cub seemed to be reconsidering. He agreed to give them time before made arrangements for her and her mother. "You should come with us, Tara. We'll be safe there."

"How exactly, is a business man from LA supposed to protect us from a drug cartel?" She repeated the information she had given her the one time she meet Nero during one of her visits to Mesa. In light of recent events, she had a feeling she knew what _business man_ really meant.

Devon confessed, confirming her hunch. "Sorry I lied. Only certain people know the truth to keep us safe from any blow back." She and her mother only knew the basics about Nero and his business. They didn't even know where he lived exactly; somewhere LA. Whenever they saw him it was because he came to visit them. "Plus he never wanted us to have to deal with the shame of having a criminal in the family." She snorted ironically. "I bet you can image how happy he was when my mom hooked up with my dad and then I married Op." They shared a laugh. "He's a good guy though. If the guys let him, he can help get them out."

"If." Tara emphasized, feeling anger well inside of her. She couldn't believe the club was actually hesitating on the chance to save their lives. "God, I swear I think I could kill him right now." She glared at Jax who stood across the room talking with Opie and his mother.

"I know the feeling. I have a damn target on my head and he's just so cool about." Devon stared at her husband with the same anger. "I should have just kept my mouth shut….I shouldn't have even come back to Charming in the first place."

"Don't say that." Tara argued. "You were only trying to protect yourself."

"And my baby." She admitted, surprising her.

Sighing, Tara hooked her arm through Devon's and tugged her closer. "You did the right thing Dev. You're going to be a mother. We're supposed to do whatever we have to and by any means necessary to protect our kids and give them the best life." She stated vehemently. "As far as I'm concerned the world and everyone in it can go to hell for Abel and Thomas."

Devon smiled and she nodded. "Thanks." She was only weeks along and she felt the same way about her baby. It was nice to have someone else who understood that.

"You're welcome….and congratulations." Tara added. "Whether it's here or LA or wherever, you're going to have the best pregnancy and be the best mother." She assured her. "And if you need any help, I'm right here. Me, you and our kids are going to survive this." There was no other outcome as far as she was concerned.

"Yeah. You're right." Devon affirmed, shaking herself out of her depression and reclaiming her confidence. She wasn't bowing out of this, no matter what.

"I'm gonna be Aunt Tara." She gushed happily, rejoicing in the one bright spot in the middle of this madness. Devon glowed at the thought of her baby and she laughed cheerfully.

"You two okay?" Opie asked his wife and Tara as he approached them.

Their smiles dropped, and he was welcomed with stone faces and cold eyes.

"Sure, now that we've got a plan to kill the two of you." Devon responded right as Jax joined them.

"It would be the easiest way for us to get out of this shit they've got us in." Tara said to her. Devon was mostly kidding, but Tara looked as though she was seriously considering it. "What do you want?" She asked, clearly irritated by their presence. "Don't you have business to take care of?"

"We need to know who your uncle is." Opie said to Devon.

"Were you not paying attention? He told you who he was."

"None of us ever heard of him." Jax explained. They had heard of Byz Lats before, but no one could confirm who the leader was. They need proof that Nero was the guy.

"Well I don't know what to tell you." She snapped. "He's always kept his business away from my mother and I. Ya know, he actually gives a damn about keeping his family safe."

"Don't." Opie warned her, offended by her implication.

"Go to hell." She fired back and handed a sleeping Thomas off to his mother before storming outside.

"If you know what's best for yourself, don't go after her." Tara cautioned Opie when he moved to follow her. Devon was spitfire on a regular day. She was very emotional and hormonal right now, it wouldn't take much for her to fly off the handle.

Lucky for him, Opie took her advice and went in the opposite direction to cool down himself.

"My mom set up a portable crib in my room and I put your stuff back there." Jax said, pulling her attention towards him.

With a sardonic attitude, she replied knowingly. "Great. Been looking forward to being in that room again."

The muscles tick in his clenching jaw and they stared at each other, the tension palpable. Finally Tara stood up from the stool, but she kept her eyes on him, up until the last second before she stepped around him and took their son to lay down.

Left alone, Jax shook his head at his shitty luck. All his mistakes with Tara, past and present, were surrounding them. He may have fucked up any chance at getting her back, but they still had their boys to raise together. He couldn't fail her again. He had to give them a better future.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

With the exception of Piney, who was just as vocally unhappy with the situation, Devon and Tara kept to themselves for the rest of the afternoon. In turn, everyone gave them their space. No one wanted to suffer their wrath, not to mention, most had heard Devon's words earlier and they resonated deep in each other them.

The club had been a part of Devon's life since she was an infant. She knew what it used to be like and she saw that the club had become a shadow of itself. Considering the state they were now in, there was no denying that SAMCRO had twisted itself so much that it was headed towards a down spiral. Something had to give and soon.

At nightfall, while a small party started up, Tara and the boys headed for bed. To her surprise, Jax joined them. Once they finished working together to get the boys down, they took turns grabbing a shower.

Jax was already in bed with Abel sleeping next to him when Tara followed suit. "Are you working tomorrow?" He asked her quietly.

"I have a surgery scheduled in the morning, after that I'm done." She said with her back towards him, rubbing lotion on her arms and legs.

"I'll take you in and bring you back after."

"Fine." She agreed impassively and climbed under the covers.

"We have a meeting with Alverez tomorrow to find out what we're dealing with." He told her, wanting her to know that he hadn't lied, he was working on getting them out of this hook up with the cartel.

"Fine."

"Tara-" He wanted her to talk to him, to look at him at least. Give him a sign that she felt something other than indifference towards him.

She interrupted him, in no mood for a chat. She was emotionally exhausted. "I just want to go to sleep Jax so goodnight." With her back still facing him, she turned off the bedside lamp and curled up under the covers.

He was left staring up at the darken ceiling, feeling uneasy. Even after they worked out an exit with Galindo, he worried that the damage was already done between him and Tara.

Despite, their break up, over the past few months, he and Tara were able to maintain a friendship. When she would drop the boys off with him at his place or the clubhouse, she would stick around sometimes and they'd talk or just hang out. From time to time, she even invited him to dinner at her house and vice versus, he would invite her to get together at the club. He liked having her around and that their connection wasn't all about the boys. The thought of losing that scared him. He could only pray that this wasn't the beginning of her shutting him out of her life.

**VVVVVVVV**

After having a few beers with his brothers, Opie called it a night. As he crept into his room, he was thankful to see Devon asleep, especially after her display in the main room earlier.

Tired and irritated, Devon staggered out Opie's dorm when she couldn't get to sleep because of the partying going on.

Who the fuck threw a party when they were hiding out because a drug cartel was planning on killing you?

She went straight for the jukebox and ripped the plug right out of the socket. Everyone quieted in favor of seeing who cut the music.

Having their attention, Devon gave them a warning. "If someone turns this back on, I swear to God, I will break every bone in both your hands." Her tone was eerily calm. "People are trying to sleep. Shut the fuck up."

She walked out without another word and they were smart enough to heed her warning.

That didn't stop the party though, they just took it outside. But inside the clubhouse, it was silent for the rest of the night.

Watching her sleep, Opie couldn't stop thinking about her being pregnant. They were going to have a baby. There shouldn't be distance between them. So despite knowing how pissed she was with him, after stripping off his clothes, he climbed in bed and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her into his chest. A right hook to the eye would be a small price to pay to have her and their kid in his arms tonight.

* * *

><p><strong>Surprise! Nero's here, and he and Devon are related. I love Nero (and Jimmy Smits) and I wanted him in my story so I figured what better why then for him to help get SAMCRO out of the dumbass cartel hook up. As a result, I put him back in the game and bumped him up from the minor leagues of organized crime to the big leagues. Yes, he's a "bad guy", but he's a bad guy with a heart. I'm a sucker for those – like Jax and Opie LoL.<strong>

**Ok, don't kill me! Jax and Tara still have a ways to go and Opie and Devon aren't exactly "back together". The primary issue between each couple is trust, but the club **_**is**_** a secondary issue. It has more to do with what the club has become and that needs to be dealt with. Not just for the sake of their relationships, but for the sake of everyone connected to SAMCRO. We all know the club went the hell in a hand basket from the end of Season 4 on. That's not happenin' in this story. **

**Now have at it - let me know what you think! **


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